I Want a Fucking Divorce
Oh you utter bunch of disloyal bastards.
Honestly, I toil away hour after hour for you fuckers, I risk my job, my sanity, by bank balance, my sleep and my marriage to bring you absolutely anything and everything musical I can possibly think of – anything to enrich your drab and pointless little lives with the illuminating joy of a beautiful tune.
I read about it, I listen to it, I accumulate it, I think about it, I track it down, I hoard it, I share it and I love it. And with a gossamer wrapping of that deepest of loves and drop of purest ambrosia (no, not the custard) I pass it on to you, my treacherous band of musical turncoats.
By necessity and due to homelessness there is no internettery in the current Toad residence, and had there been I can promise I would have put a stop to this weekend’s skulduggery post haste. What do I find on returning to work this morning and happily signing in to check the comments and visits of the little brood of musical internet chicks I have so lovingly nurtured through the highs and lows these last years? I find that you have cruelly and wantonly abandoned me for another more fair and who suits your tastes better, that’s what. And who is this harlot for whom you have forsaken your steadfast and devoted Toad? None other than my own erstwhile sweetheart (and now bitter rival) the scurrilous and deceitful Mrs. Toad!
That’s the last bloody time I let her near this blog, it really is. Bastards.
British Sea Power – Remember Me
Shout Out Louds – Oh, Sweetheart
Wilco – I’m the Man Who Loves You
Mark Mulcahy – The Way She Really Is
Buffalo Tom – Does This Mean You’re Not My Friend?
(Not a bad wee podcast, that one, I thought 
Told you all she was a fox)
bring her back! swearing in a scottish accent is a wonderful counterpoint to swearing in your can-only-be-described-as-posh (no offence) accent.
And she was on her best behaviour too!
aw, poor, poor mr. toad!
Don’t condescend Marcy, it isn’t wholesome
i had loads more written, then reconsidered as i thought it might be overkill.
what a tragedy, lol.
I listened to that podcast a few days late, but I must say, Mrs. Toad indeed has good taste. It was a funny thing, but that dilemma you described, where her old records were all good and old punk, while her current taste is along the lines of crap dance music (the Madonnas and Kylies of the world, I think you mentioned?), reminds me of the transformation my mom made somewhere along the late 1990s. Mrs. Toad is wittier than my mom, though. To second Shane, I hope she comes back for another round to balance out your poshness.
She will be mortified to hear that she is adding the common touch to balance out my poshness. Brilliant. She works in an industry where it actually helps to be posh. No-one I work with cares, beyond the opportunity for easy jokes.
Well, it’s not that she sounds more “common,” it’s just that she doesn’t speak in BBC English.