Hate: bob dylan daniel johnston eef barzelay pearl jam radiohead
by Matthew
12 comments
Toad 2.0
Let’s All Humilate the Weak Together. What Fun!

I enjoyed reading this little bit in the Times about a judge in Manchester getting stuck into some goddamn awful talk show because it provoked one of its guests into nutting someone on air. The quote from the Times piece is here:
“The circumstances of this case are exceptional and the provocation involved seems to be paramount. I have had the misfortune of viewing The Jeremy Kyle Show and I feel bound to make some observations.
“It seems to me that the whole purpose of the show is to effect a morbid and depressing display of dysfunctional people who are in some kind of turmoil. It is for no more and no less than titillating members of the public who have nothing better to do with their mornings than sit and watch this show, which is a human form of bear-baiting under the guise of entertainment. The people responsible for this, namely the producers, should in my opinion be in the dock with you, Mr Staniforth.”
Good. Fuck the producers of these things and fuck the audiences too. This must be one of the most utterly unedifying sights in modern culture, how we get together to mock, deride and humiliate the weak and the foolish in our society. I am not saying they aren’t entertaining because I find them compellingly awful myself – they are the very epitome of car crash TV. But I do not and will not watch them. Circus talk shows, the love of reality TV, the mobs who gang up to attack paediatricians, the howls of self-righteous outrage that accompany press witch-hunts – they’re all part of the same ugly instinct and I really wish we knew better than to indulge it.
The people who watch shows like this remind me of the outraged mob who formed when the children who killed James Bulger were released in 2001. Most of those people were dreadful human beings going about making threats and getting on their high horses about something for no other apparent reason than to simply manage to give their own lives a sheen of validity by forcibly making the point that no matter how worthless they were as individuals, at least they weren’t as bad as those two Evil Child Murderers. It had nothing to do with the issues at hand, it was just personal validation through facile, hysterical self-righteousness.
With talk shows the mechanism seems to be similar: part of the enjoyment of watching is intrinsically related with boosting our own self worth by claiming acres of distance between our own normal, banal lives and the freaks that are on the telly. With Venables and Thompson, at least they actually did something bad. The reaction to it was disgusting to behold, but they at least were responsible themselves, although given they were ten at the time, the extent is debatable.
In the talk show scenario all the exhibits need to do to deserve our vicious taunting and ridicule is to be dysfunctional. Or stupid. Or weak. We are rounding up the lame and the impotent, putting them on show like animals and then provoking them to do something humiliating so we can all laugh at them. How is this different from the early years of boxing, where some folks would ’round up a couple a niggers’ and make them batter each other to a bloody, comatose pulp for the entertainment and sport of the white audience? This is the level at which the producers of these shows find themselves. Congratulations. You must be very proud. How is this any different from dog fighting? The only difference is that neither being mentally deficient, rather than actually brain damaged, nor emotionally crippled are currently recognised as being part of a neatly defined ‘minority’ deserving of protection or pity.
If you watch this shit you are essentially enjoying the humiliation of the weak to make yourself feel better and you should be abjectly fucking ashamed of yourself. Is it any wonder bullying is on the rise in schools? This is why I hate the Pete Doherty Tabloid Circus. That is why watching these idiotically vain celebrities and pseudo-celebrities make fools of themselves for us all to laugh at on reality TV turns my stomach. That’s why I felt such a dick for posting that Britney rant the other week. Yes, they are culpable themselves and yes, it is compelling in a rather gut-wrenching way. But we should have some fucking dignity and have our fun at the expense of someone capable of defending themselves for a change.
So, erm… Christ. What songs do I put with that little honey, then?
Radiohead – Karma Police
Daniel Johnston – Like a Monkey in the Zoo
Eef Barzelay – Ballad of Bitter Honey
Bob Dylan – Who Killed Davey Moore?
Pearl Jam – Jeremy
Spot on.
DC
George Bush hurts other people. Talk shows just make us stupid. One is the symptom and the other is the disease. People who have no sense of personal moral responsibility tend to have their personalities reflected in the people they entrust with their government. Sorry, the Bush thing upsets me, and the talk show crowd put him where he is.
Man. That image hurts me. I think any song from the Bad Religion catalogue would also apply.
We’re a sad sad bunch.
Fair enough.
Well said, Mr. Toad. On this subject, I would like to see the Big Brother monstrosity put to rest once and for all. This whole thing is dumbed down and shows the absolute worst aspects of humankind, whether it’s the ugliest part of humanity or the sneering of those who find it entertainment.
And you are utterly right about those people who act like they have the moral highground. A few years back in Stirling, Scotland, there was one woman who was a very high-profile ‘anti-paedophile campaigner.’ She also happened to be a heroin dealer. I find the abuse of children hideous and should never be condoned, but so is dealing a drug that fucks up so many lives (and I niether drink nor smoke before anyone yells hypocrite at me).
Oh, good music choices too, obviously.
Yes indeed….absolutely bang on Mr Toad.
Excellent post. Could not agree more. I have, for the most part, avoided “reality” TV, with the exceptions of the 1st & 3rd seasons of “The Real World,” 1st season of “Who Wants to Be A Superhero?” (I couldn’t bring myself to watch this one after I saw the assortment of idiots they assembled, save for the lovely Basura), “Ghost Hunters” and “Mind Control with Derren Brown.” Oh, OK, and “Fear Factor,” but that was mostly for Joe Rogan. But for that, I feel these have some redeeming qualities to them. All in all, I like some craft in my entertainment, not “dumbfucks in a kwaaazee situation, let’s film it!” I find that I tend towards depressing shit like “COPS” and Maury Povich’s coin flip “you are [not] the father” gimmick, but that’s an extremely black humor I mustn’t give into.
(Do you even get any of these across the pond? I could have invented all of them wholesale and you mightn’t have known the diff.)
One thing: “paediatricians”? It’s funny if it’s intentional; it’s funnier still if it’s not. I’m pretty sure the two terms mean their respective same things in American and British parlance, but perhaps I’m missing some vital reference.
How about Come On Eileen by Dexys Midnight Runners?
VJB2 – some people over here seriously and in all honesty attacked a paediatrician’s clinic because they were outraged about paedophilia. Or toasted sandwiches. Or something. Work class fuckwittery of the highest order.
We don’t get a few of those programs but we have a few of our own that are equally bad. But I wouldn’t have deprived the world of Rebecca Loos jerking off a pig for all the tea in China. Priceless, priceless moment!
Unfortunately, the paediatrician incident (albeit the one that captured the media attention) happened down here in South Wales. Which, sadly to say, says an awful lot about the education standards in Wales AND is a sad indicement of the Welsh language – when you have so many bastardisations of English words (e.g. fideo = video, etc) propping up a minority language struggling to keep pace with a rapidly evolving social interactivity, coupled with a law that states all public information literature/signs/etc must be bi-lingual, my lunk-headed countrymen get all brain-wrong & misunderstandy & devilishly chopsy with it. Result? A 40-strong neanderthal herd, including children young carrying placards calling for the forcible removal of the “sickos”, march on a Paediatrician’s clinic after one of their tribe happened to notice the practice’s brass sign on the building facia earlier that day.
O, we laughed for moment & then ran & hid for a month as the battery of media “what a bunch of dumb fuckwits” assaults descended on the country & we were once again, countrymen all, gleefully hand-rolled into one great tarpit.
DC
It’s one of those things that is really quite funny, unless you spend any time thinking about it whatsoever.



















How about “Atrocity Exhibition” by Joy Division? This is why I don’t watch George Bush’s press conferences.