Song, by Toad

“aural effluvium like Newton Faulkner” – your only possible excuse is that either you’re totally deaf, or completely lacking in anything vaguely resembling taste in music. Sorry, but I’ve seen Newton live several times and the is no-one currently out there who can get close, either as a musician or an entertainer. And to mention him in the same sentence as Kate Nash is a joke. Rather than rejoice that an actual musician has made it to the maintream. You’re obviously one of those people who blindly assumes that anyone who succeeds in mainstream and gets played on radio one must, therefore, be rubbish! Shame on you! Any guitarists out there, watch this and weep!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpanipkxbwA

If anyone reading this has any interest in real live music, with no looping pedals or other electronic trickery, go and see Newton and make up your own mind.

I enjoy playing guitar, I’m not particularly good, I’m certainly nowhere near as good as some of the other regular readers of this site; and judging by that video, I’m not even as good as Mr. Faulkner. I believe I am better than Kate Nash, though.

Karen, I’ve no wish to detract from your enjoyment of that Newton Faulkner performance as it clearly means a lot to you, but you do claim that Mr. Faulkner’s skills eclipse those of other musicians currently at work, and that’s just not the case.

It appears that Mr. Faulkner has fitted his electro-acoustic with a very light set of strings and turned the pre-amp presence and volume on the guitar all the way up. That’s how he’s achieving those clear fundamental tones from his left hand fret-tapping technique. That, coupled with a couple of rudimentary slides and harmonic strikes, does create a very seductive overall sound. However, it’s not all that hard to do.

Electro-magnetic trickery as opposed to electronic.

But music certainly doesn’t need to be complicated to be fun; and if Newton’s making people happy, perhaps that’s all that matters in the end.

Dylan. I think you’re being kind on this girl. To make a claim that no-one can get close to Mr Faulkner in this day and age is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard. Whether I like his music or not – and for the record I don’t – doesn’t even register at the moment because I have seen many many musicians who make this man look like an amateur, with their eyes shut.

Having just sat and watched Tom Waits – the ultimate entertainer – sit at a piano and play to a captivated Playhouse I can do nothing but laugh at such a silly suggestion.

I’m glad Newton Faulkner makes people happy. That’s what music is about. He’s not to my taste but good luck to him. But please, lets keep the comments sensible……….well to a degree at least….

For the last hour I’ve been trying to summarise my dislike for Newton Faulkner into a coherent argument. But it seems his Wikipedia entry has done it for me.

“His first band was a Green Day cover band, in which he played bass guitar. His experience on the stage grew as he formed Half A Guy, a funk rock group with a quirky edge…”

CASE CLOSED.

Hi Dylan, thanks for your thoughtful & coureous response. I don’t doubt that you’re a better guitarist than Kate Nash – not a huge challenge there! However, I think that maybe you missed my point about Newton Faulkner. I’m not saying that there aren’t better guitarists out there – what I am saying is that he’s one of the very few to have broken into the mainstream.

Yes, it’s an electro-acoustic guitar – well spotted! On the string front, I checked with the guitar nerds on Newton’s forum and apparently he always uses Elixir Nanoweb med, which is E1 – 0.013. I don’t think I’d call that very light, would you? OK a bit of tapping, slides & harmonics – Not all that hard to do, you think, eh? OK here’s a challenge – you try it, standing up and singing at the same time – put it up here or on Youtube and I’ll be the first to congratulate you…IF you pull it off.

If you go and see Newton in Edinburgh I’d be very interested to read your review.!

17 pound 50 to see him?!?!?!!

Case closed, Karen.

Case closed.

standing up and singing at the same time. it’s like rubbing your head and patting your stomach.

Euan – couple of questions – how old is Tom Waits and would you really consider him mainstream. I’m a huge fan, but come off it. It’s hardly a reasonable comparison!

Bart – so, you judge music by the artists Wikipedia entry – nuff said!

As you guys say, let’s keep the comments sensible.

Case pending!

Well I don’t care for the term “mainstream” anyways. What does that mean?? Pop? I don’t know. Plus, I think my point was that you said, and I quote “there is currently nobody who can get close to him as either a musician or an entertainer”………. so I assumed age, popularity wouldn’t come into play in such a generalisation – but if popularity is coming into play then Tom Waits is a totally fair comparison. He’s 58 by the way and has been producing quality music since the early 70s. So lets not have a debate about who’s the better “musician/entertainer” – case closed on that one.

Do I like Newton Faulkner. No. Do I think there are better performers/musicians. Performers – never seen him, can’t comment. Musicians. Yes.

It’s that simple.

Damn.

I’ve ballsed Matthew’s lovely website right up. Now we’ve got people coming here expecting sensible comments.

Euan – you can’t comment on standing up and singing – you’re a piano player! How would you know? Sitting around on your arse all the time… Easy life.

I won’t be going to see Newton Faulkner, regrettably. I’ve made other plans.

Rod Stewart’s coming round to suck my cock.

Sorry, my mistake! Almost got a reasonable conversation going, but hey ho! Have fun Dylan, at least it saves you doing it yourself.

I don’t think my point is unreasonable. I am certainly not trying to be unreasonable. If I was trying to be unreasonable I would have said:

Newton Faulkner is shit. I hate his music. And I don’t care if he’s a good guitar player, I know lots of good guitar players but being good on guitar does not automatically make you a good song writer. Which he, in my opinion, is not.

But I didn’t say that. I responded to a very genuine comment that “nobody” compares to this man as a musician or entertainer. Nobody apparently – I also answered your questions. I think I make a fair point too. I also stated that this was just my opinion and I’m happy he exists for all those that love his music.

God I’m so unreasonable.

Dylan – you are right. As somebody who sits down whilst singing I cannot possibly comment on how hard/easy it is to perform infront of people. I withdraw everything I have said to this point and refer you to Bart’s initial comments. )

Whilst Rod is around (you) why not play some black kids in the background.

Bugger! You beat me to a Black Kids joke!

I had one lined up and everything!

And I didn’t say you didn’t know about performing in front of people – it was just a joke about the standing up bit..

Actually, you could try standing up at the piano like that bloke from Toploader – now there was a talent!

For the record, I wasn’t judging Newton Faulkner’s music entirely on his wikipedia entry.

I was also taking into account his fucking ridiculous haircut.

I really like his haircut.

Oh – hang on – you meant Newton Faulkner.

I thought you were talking about the bloke from Toploader.

There does seem to be a certain amount of correlation between the quality of an artist and the quality of their haircut.

I’ve been formulating the same theory for film directors for years, but it seems to extend to musicians too.

Dylan – knew it was a joke. As was my witty retort – which obviously didn’t work on paper. I don’t know how to do italics etc.

haircuts vs musical ability – that’s got to be an entirely new post right?!

what happened to karen by the way?

She got bored, so she popped round to see me!

Yeah, she seemed nice.

I hate when we do that to people. scaring them off is just bad form.

Yep, you barstards! She’s sobbing her little heart out!

Are you listening to Newton Faulkner together?!

If one of them’s listening to Newton Faulkner – then the other one is too!

No, actually it’s Tom Waits – Alice!

great choice.

Newton Faulkner is no Yngwie Malmsteen. And Tom Waits is no Ronnie James Dio. Hail Satan.

Hail Santa!

Snail Hunter!

Erm, has anyone seen my friend Karen? She said she’d come and read the site and see what she thought.

Bart, are you making fun of haircuts?