Cinque per Venerdì
This week, the Friday Five commemorates Mr. & Mrs. Toad’s official state visit to Italy, with questions and music that reflect the culture and history of that great nation.
They’re staying in Puglia, apparently. The ‘heel’ of Italy’s ‘boot’, geographically speaking. An agricultural region, it’s well known for its abundance of fresh fruit and vegetables. Obviously, however, the Toads will be happy anywhere they can get their hands on gin in biblical quantities.
I’d also like to say how well I think Euan’s been doing so far at the conn of the Starship Toadiprise. It’s certainly been a refreshing change of direction for the site, perhaps a little bit more intimate in tone than usual, and with some unusual but rewarding detours. I particularly like the article about the We Sink Ships online photgraphic exhibition. Nicely done, sir.
So, as usual at this time of the week, here’s your opportunity to creep out from the woodwork and talk arse with a bunch of other skiving ne’er-do-wells. This week’s five is possibly not the most biting piece of reportage you’ll have ever encountered, but it’s a vast improvement on last week’s disaster!
So, with a note of apology and a view to casting all memories of Matthew’s despicable scatological fetishes aside, here’s the Friday Five.
1. Which tantalisingly delicious Italian delicasy do you find most maddeningly irresistible?
2. Ferrari, Lamborghini or Maserati?
3. Most notable Italian historical figure.
4. What would you do with a fortnight in Italy?
5. What did the Romans ever do for us?
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Tiziano Ferro – Stop! Dimentica
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1. It’s actually ‘delicacy’, I believe. Although given my current spellchecker thinks I am trying to write in Italian, everything is spelled wrong, apparently. To answer the question, Ossobuco, without a doubt.
2. Maserati – they just look more confident – mean, but not trying too hard like the other two. Well, the old ones did anyway.
3. Franco Baresi.
4. So far, practically nothing.
5. They appeared, with sterling panache, in the Asterix books. Oh, and some roads and aqueducts and orgies, apparently. But mostly the Asterix stuff.
Cheers lads, great work so far. I am off to… erm, not sure actually, do fuck all probably.
Ha ha – first!
Fiiiiiiiiirst!!
(Unless it takes me a stupidly long time to type this – so long that upon pressing submit the page reloads with a bajillion comments already posted.)
Ahem,
1) Weird, ridiculously expensive pistachio paste thing (It can be eaten on toast, but only if you’re rich. Normal people eat it with spoons, over the course of a very long time.)
2)I am unfamiliar with these words.
3)Mussolini? ‘Notable’ is definitely entirely the wrong word here, but he’s the only Italian historical figure I can remember (unless we’re counting Romans? Are we?) A testimony to our education system.
4)Gorge myself upon various Italian foodstuffs?
5)Aqueducts! And of course, the invention of the wheel.
At least I managed to predict my own downfall.
Matthew, why are you wasting your hols on the internet? Go and be disgustingly touristy.
Just uploading tomorrow’s podcast, then buggering off. It’s at 41.3% at the moment. Booooring.
1. Pizza
2. Lasagna
3. Gnocchi
4. Cannelloni
5. Roads
57.3%
1. Parma Ham
2. Fiat 500
3. some Fascist Wanker
4. start a left wing revolution
5. Roads and Pizza
i’m nearly missing you Matthew!!!
Ah, those crazy Italians with their slow internet!
If only they didn’t spend all their time making ice-cream, they could probably fix that.
1. i am a pizza fiend. with jalepenos. lots of thme.
2. Lamborghini countach – when i were a lad, everyone used to talk about them. but really, i don’t care for cars much
3. Mussolini was pretty notable, no?
4. I would ride my bike through the hills and mountains. maybe go on a cycle tour. unless the consequential half was with me and i’d then take in a city holiday probably
5. sewerage systems. my job relies on this.
out of all the places in italy i have been, puglia is the only one
Dylan, there was only one poo-related question last week. I am starting to think I might know who the one with the fetish is.
66.5%
71.0%
COME ONNNNNN!!!!
Today is Faith No More day….just bought 3 tickets to see the fuckers.
Excited is an understatement
1. Oooh, this is a good one. Perhaps a delicious slice of torta di dolcelatte, served with a succulent white peach. How about a silken slice of proscioutto or braesola, drizzled with a little peppery olive oil. In Genoa, I had a fantastic dish of artichoke ravioli tossed with tiny sweet clams which I won’t forget in a hurry. But I think the winner of this prize has to be a fresh slice of proper pizza. Hot, sweet dough, luscious tomatoes, creamy mozzarella, perhaps a couple of slices of Milano salami or anchovies thrown on there. Oh yes.
2. Even though I made up the question, am I allowed to say the Alfa Romeo 8C Competizione, probably the most gorgeous car ever designed, or the amazing Lancia Stratos?
No? Well in that case it would probably be the Lamborghini Miura or the Ferrari 250 GTO.
(That was just a blatant excuse to link to a load of car porn! Haha!)
3. How about Silvio Berlusconi? He’s a card!
4. Eat, drink wine, hire one of the cars above. I want to go to Napoli, even though I’ve heard it can be a bit rough.
5. Under-floor heating.
1. Pizza. Usually from La Favorita on Leith Walk.
2. Bertolucci.
3. Chico Marx.
4. I probably wouldn’t spend any time uploading a podcast to the internet.
5. Roman Mythology. I just love the idea of taking another culture’s belief system, changing the names a little bit, and then trying to pass it off as your own.
Welcome to Christianity, Barticles. Re-read the Bible for me and let me know where the trees and reindeer and chocolate eggs get mentioned.
“silken slice of proscioutto”
Were you actually masturbating while you wrote this?
94.1%
That’s alright, Bart. We’ll just delete Matthew’s podcast once it’s up and put that other one we were working on up instead.
99.8% – later, suckers.
Well, I did toss my clams into some artichoke ravioli.
would that make a change?
http://www.unicornmuseum.org/
1. Luscious deep red tomatoes with mozzarella, a couple of basil leaves and a drizzle of balsamic vinegar. So simple, yet so amazing.
2. Are they space ships or something?
3. One of the big Roman emperors.
4. Go street orienteering in all their crazy old towns on hilltops, all to a soundtrack of this guy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmLHQZ9Op-E&feature=related
5. Inspire a decade of lycra clad Gladiators? I am struggling today.
Spaceships?!
I would have thought the commentators on this site would have been able to appreciate great art in all its forms. I don’t know… Philistines!
Oh, and I think we should have a steward’s enquiry into Dav’s five.
1. It would have to be bruchetta i suppose as there cakes are usually rubbish
2. maserati without a doubt (not that i would be able to tel the difference (now where’s my top trumps gone?)
3. has to Hadrian for me having given me plenty to dig up
4. Sit in a piazza and drink good wine till the sun goes down
5. give me pleny to dig up 2000 years later
ok.
1. Pizza
2. When I was a lad I really liked lamborghinis, mainly due to the lovely yellow colour. I now drive a wee neddy corsa (it has a spoiler and alloys) therefore any other fucking car would be ace.
3. Caesar, I like his salads.
4. I went to Italy for a fortnight when I was 14, we went to Gardaland, and had a romantic gondala ride with my brothers, dad and stepmum. I also ended up in hospital where I lay in a hospital room with blood on the walls. Great.
5. Roads.
better?
Yes, much. Thank you.
Apart from the blood on the walls thing. Was it your blood?
1. Espresso – yeah, alright, but the word’s italian so surely the drink is?
2. I do not give a flying fuck about cars.
3. Paolo Maldini (a man’s man)
4. Walk around Venice. I did this for three days in October last year and would very much like to do it some more, it was lovely.
5. Asterix is a good answer.
Bart, Chico Marx was Czechoslovakian, watch Animal Crackers.
1. Pizza – i’m with bart, la favorita’s for sure!
2. lamborghini – loved those matchbox cars, especially my lamborghini countach. and also, the girls who drove them in canonball run – daisy duke i believe was one of them. fuck me she was hot!
3. agricola
4. probably just wander around and check out all the beautiful cities and towns and women.
5. loads, but cannot be bothered thinking about it all right now.
and dylan – thanks for the kind words. glad you’ve enjoyed it so far.
The first espresso machines were introduced at the beginning of the 20th Century, with the first patent being filed by Luigi Bezzera of Milan, Italy, in 1901…
I reckon that makes Espresso Italian, Adam.
Hurrah!
Hurrah! I’d like to take this opportunity to recommend ‘The Devils Cup: A History Of The World According To Coffee’ which is a damn fine book.
1. pizza
2. maserati
3. michelangelo antonioni
4. is it okay to say i would love to hunt down and kill berlusconi. what a prick.
5. they gave us nero, caligula, constantine…what a bunch of characters. oh those guys.
dav (king of the chavs)
1. There have been some quality answers to this already. it all sounds so delicious…
2. I’m not into cars and don’t know anything about them. (This is not an invitation to call me gay.)
3. Rocky
4. Ski
5. Left piles of interesting rocks in Northern england for us to look around if we pay 5 quid.
1. spaghetti bolognaise or meatballs – may be obvious choices, but i eat a lot of both
2. Boring!
3. Marino Marini
4. Uber tourist stuff, because i have not been before. i want to see the Colliseum and the undergroud labyrinths of Rome
5. I don’t know so i googled it – Language, Numbers, Roads, Coins, Food, Buildings. So quite important stuff apparently…
And under-floor heating.
if you google search famous italians, the first 3 images are leonardo di caprio, sylvester stallone and madonna then in 4th places it’s michaelangelo. ffs.
i think Korea may have a claim on inventing under floor heating
Yeah?
Well the Koreans definitely didn’t install it in the Roman villa in the village in Essex where I grew up!
how can you be sure?
Cos I did a project on it in junior school. Duh.
1. Prosciutto e Prosecco
2. Vespa
3. JULIUS FUCKING CAESAR
4. Double my bodyweight and halve my life expectancy
5. One helluva religion
Can I just say to Voldermania, Becky, Adam, Dan, Shonagh and anyone else thinking of ducking the car question because they’re just too cool to talk about boring cars or something…
And to Bart who just mentioned some random Irish fella, Bert O’Lucci or something. Don’t know who that is.
Look! Honestly, just look!!
That’s a great piece of art you can put next to anything by Bert O’-bloody-Lucci and the rest of them!
Spaceships, indeed.
i bet you smell foosty
I still fail to see how “car” and “art” belong in the same sentence.
Unless that sentence contains the word “cartography”.
I am as it happens far too cool to speak about cars – fact…
Just look at that Alfa, look at the one line that sweeps up from the front sill, over the wheel arch, up around the side window and back past the vent toward the wheel hub, and consider how it implies a musical treble clef.
That shit’s not by accident! Somebody did that because they wanted to express something.
Look at how the high haunches and long wings evoke classic racing cars of the last century, but the squat profile and the wheels placed at the exremities of the chassis tie it firmly into the modern. Such juxtaposition and comparison is at the heart of much great art.
Look at the line that sweeps up from the nose, drawing attention to the emblem, the car’s identity, and imbuing it with a sense of purpose, yet acknowledging its great beauty.
And you haven’t even seen the back!
Are you talking about rugby again… sorry, was just too cool to read all of that
yadda yadda yawn
just passing and couldn’t resist putting in my tuppence worth. Hope you’re enjoying Italy but watch out for those southerners..
1. Baca’la’ a’la visentina – made by my girlfriend’s mamma!
2. pointless showy Italian gas guzzlers
3. If only Berlusconi was a historical figure and not currently in power hiring high class prostitutes for bond villain-esque parties!
4. In my experience this involves eating or talking about eating…
5. Showed us how to run an efficient empire and take over other people’s countries..
and if I may be so bold as to offer a couple of Italian musical links;
Mina’s “Parole, Parole” – words, words
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrlew2G6nvA
Lucio Battisti “Senza te” – without you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmvmEmeidD4
oh and finally, apparently Berlusconi started his career singing on cruise ships;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnA6_GEm5y0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ta1Ypl1wTYI&feature=related
cars are shite. matchbox cars were cool when i was young. real cars are shite.
This is a joint effort from Stockbridge….
1. Mackies Ice Cream
2. Renault Clio
3. Eva Peron
4. Go to Seaworld
5. The hotdog
Thanks for dropping in Brian, a splendid contribution, a bit of culture is just what the rest of this rabble needs!
Precisely.
See? Art!
shite art
1. proper pizza
2. pass
3. michaelangelo
4. eat pizza and drink wine
5. I quite like a nice mosaic myself..
1. Ravioli. Or as previously mentioned a really good pizza from La Favorita.
2. What’s the question? Am I looking for the odd one out?
3. Uhhh… whover invented spaghetti.
4. I’d probably sweat a lot and complain about it being too hot for my scottish constitution.
5. Apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh-water system, and public health. Nothing.
1) Carpacio. All animal products are better raw!
2) Hmm. Not really a fan of that sort of car. I like the Honda Fit (or Honda Jazz in the UK I beleive).
3) Ooh so many.I mean Mazzini sort of invented Italy as a concept so you have to respect that but, Brunelleschi for me.
4) The Misses and I tend to plan our Holidays around an 2:1 split of sightseeing and beach bumbing. So Rome, Florence and coast.
5) Invented fishboad brickwork. It allws for a much more stable structure and is the technology behind what was at the time the worlds largest dome. See my answer for no. 3 really. For all the bleating about Italian art, it’s really the fusion of art and pragmatism and the beautification of functional items from the largest building to the bottle opener which rev’s my motor.
I haven’t been inside a car for years.
Quite an achievement, I know.
Car porn = sacralidge
Is sacralidge a bad thing?
Well you do have a point there, Ben darling. But I still protest the coupling of sex and automobiles. Unless you’re doin it right on the hood, there’s no point of involving a car at all.
I am liking how I’ve managed to sneak in here while they’ve all gone out to the pub and thereby escaped the wrath due me for commenting before answering! heheh
I’ll never tell.
I don’t see the cars/sex link either.
Sex/music, sure. Sex/food, why certainly. Sex/dance not my thing but I’ll buy it. But cars? Hmm.
tart!!!!!!!!!!!sort it out!
RULE! Tart needs disciplin… oh never mind.
I don’t drive, I live with someone who doesn’t drive, I grew up with parents who didn’t drive, I’ve never lived in a household with a car and I just don’t care about them. I would go and look at the pictures but the best you’d probably get out of me even then is ‘the red one’.
Fine, … I’m a conformist in the end, haha…..
… my favorite Italian delicacy however, is espresso with a huge slice of panetonne
1.I’m sorry to burst your bubbles but darlings, pizza is American. Tomatoes are a New World fruit so unless you’re having a white pizza you’re eating what has surely descended from the streets of NYC
2. I like to ride, but not in cars.
3. Galileo, honestly, how can it be anyone else?
4. Same thing I always do in foreign countries: sleep in, order room service, eat delicious things, drink loads of coffee, putter around town, and wait for MChutney to get back from sightseeing and museum going. Then have crazy loud sex and go out for a great dinner, perfect day!
5. The calendar
like i’m at the pub??!!
hahah like I’ll hate disciplining!
Tart’s answers are stupid. My calendar has darts players on it, not Romans.
tart – pizza is american??? wtf?!!!?? that said, nothing beats coke and a slice. i might open a shop like that here cause that’s the best fast food ever!!
just of interest. are there certain people not posting on this site whilst matthew is on holiday because it’s not matthew???????
Dylan’s turned into a big mean tyrant whilst Himself is away and it’s no wonder some people have scuttled off! So THERE!
and my answers were fine! go look up the origin of your calendar yourself ya ogre!
I think there’s a degree of determined point-missing-for-the-sake-of-it going on here over this car question.
98% of cars are crap tin-boxes designed to the lowest common-denominator to meet the requirements of the largest available market sector at the lowest cost.
In exactly the same way as 98% of music is crap stereotyped production-line celebrity-driven trash designed to the lowest common-denominator to meet the demands of the largest available market sector.
Whereas 2% of music represents the pinnacle of human endeavour and emotional engagement and exploration in that particular field, and that’s largely the sort of music the people who visit this site seem to appreciate, in my experience.
However, I suspect that I might be correct to suggest that there’s a collective reluctancy here to give up any ground – possibly for fear of sacrificing some arch notion of ‘cool’ – in order to entertain the concept that 2% of car design and construction might represent a similar pinnacle of creative endeavour, artistic expression and achievement in craftsmanship.
I personally wouldn’t put – say – Meursault or Jason Lytle in the same bag as Rihanna or The Jonas Brothers simply on the grounds that they all ‘do music’, anymore than I would put an Alfa Romeo 8C or a Ferrari 250 in the same bag as a Ford Mondeo or Honda Civic just on the grounds that they are ‘all cars’.
That would just be daft, wouldn’t it?
Euan’s in charge!
Yeah, well, I might just go and look at my darts players instead! So there!
I think there’s a degree of determined point-missing-for-the-sake-of-it regarding who’s in charge here and who cares for which topic at hand! Your hobby is cars, which as has been illustrated, no one shares. My hobby is sex, which has been illustrated, nearly everyone has at least a flying interest in. So shove on… have a wank over your darts players, and do tell me about it in the morning, per usual
No it’s not.
I’ve never actually considered it before, but I might venture that my hobby, if anything, is the top 2% of human artistic endeavour.
And I don’t believe I carry prejudice or pre-conceptions as to what field that endeavour should be in so as to make me look or feel ‘cool’.
I’m starting to feel very unpopular.
Oh you’re not unpopular… just cars are, sweetie xoxo
1. Silvio Berlusconi.
2. Is that a law firm or something?
3. Chef Boyardee.
4. Finger it.
5. If it wasn’t for the Romans you’d all be speaking Carthaginian today.
not gonna five…
can’t make me…
hhaha
Bear. Rule. Fact.
You know what happens to disobedient bears, don’t you?
bears get heckled
delete the bloody
bear owns chutney-man!
bring it on…catch you later hairy man
Tart, I often feel like I’m picking a fight with you, and for that I’m sorry. I am of course not..
So tomatoes were actually brought back to Europe by explorers who discovered the new world from the people who already lived there in the fifteen hundreds. They were quickly spread throughout Italy, and were used as a topping on a poor food flat bread covered in spices and olives largely.
This being in the 1500 there was of course no one living in the modern day America. No one. At all. It was deserted.
Although I bet there was a still a queue round the block for John’s Pizza on Bleecker Street.
Hahahah I knew you’d be the one to call me out, Ben, bless you!
But, tomatoes yes… tomato sauce and cheese as we know it melted on top, that is a 20th century concoction straight from the streets of NYC. According to “The Straight Dope” which I take as my source of all information on trivialities, the first recipe for Italian tomato sauce was from 1692. But I’ll grant you that pizza could be originating from Italy… made popular by America
Haha!
If you are ever in Boston Tart I would be glad to take you to the North End (Italian neighborhood) and enjoy the Italian/America saucy goodness.
Also did I read ‘Eva Peron’ right? Am I not getting a joke somewhere along he line?
You’re ON! And come to Chi-town to have a real, manly pizza… none of that sissy stuff you call pizza over there, (although it is delicious, I’ll grant you that) xooxox
Tart I work in Ballet and have six different types of vinegar, five oils in my kitchen and I’d spending a week on holiday in Provincetown this summer. Sissy is a term I have become quite comfortable with.
i love Bleeker Street…..in fact i had my i love Bleeker Street T-Shirt on last night
It’s Sunday but fuck it, I love Italy.
1) Risotto! Easy. Or maybe Parmigiano Regiano.. King of Italian cheese. Or Parma Ham. Tough.
2) But I have absolutely no interest in cars.
3) Alessandro Del Piero.
4) Eat and drink. Both heavily. And for prolonged periods of time.
5) Without this.. no wine! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wine_press
Incidentally, my parents and brother are in Puglia right now. Jammy bastards.
sorry tart, but the pizza is definitely Italian.. The margherita pizza for example was invented in 1889 to commemorate her visiting Naples;
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margherita_of_Savoy
I have a very vague recollection of being in a sushi bar on Bleeker Street and the mens toilets were also the ladies toilets. It was neither big nor clever but heck they do good drugs out there.
The Slaughtered Lamb pub round the corner from Bleecker on West 4th Street also had funny toilets, if I recall correctly. You sort of walked down a narrow, twisty flight of stairs from the bar room straight into the bathroom, I think.