Friday Has Five Aces
There is a betting shop under the house next door who once offered us something like seven or eight grand, or something like that, to build a fire exit out of their place into our back garden. Quite apart from whether or not that compensation would actually match the resulting devaluation of the house, which it probably wouldn’t have, the idea of having Ladbrokes employees peering into our garden while we were sitting out there with a cup of tea didn’t really sound appealing.
Also, they claimed that the door would be alarmed, but we didn’t really have a lot of faith in that, and rather feared the employees finding a way around this and spending a lot of time smoking fags in our back garden. In the words of Han Solo: “No reward is worth this!”
Anyway, betting shops have always kinda fascinated me. They always look so desperate, like the people inside are clutching to the last tiny strand of courage they have left and vesting it all in some ropey old nag in the 4.30 at Doncaster. It’s that haunted, defeated kind of look and the 1980s cross-channel ferry decor that just makes them look like the most appalling joy-sinks imaginable.
In any case, gambling is something I have never been drawn to in the slightest, primarily because games of chance are governed by mathematics and in the long run you will lose, and when it comes to placing bets based on close inside knowledge, I always seem to be surprised no matter how much I know about the topic in hand.
I mean, I know football inside out, particularly the English Premiership and I seem to have absolutely no ability whatsoever to predict the results. I know the Scottish music scene pretty well these days, but would I honestly have faith in my ability to pick the Next Big Thing Out of Scotland? No, probably not, not to the extent that I’d bet on it anyway.
Now you may say that in starting a record label that this is exactly what I’m doing, but I’m not, I’m making a different kind of bet altogether. I have noticed over time that for all I like alternative stuff, my taste still conforms to a certain part of the mainstream, and I am betting that if I just stick to releasing stuff I really like, rather than trying to second-guess a band’s potential for making it big, then my natural overlap with the mainstream will mean that we release enough music people like to make the whole venture financially sensible.
That’s the theory anyway.
So, there are some good gigs this week, so please attend them and take the opportunity to take photos of hipsters looking hip and enter them into our competition to win a copy of the wonderful Communion Compilation. Just email your pictures (old or new) to me at songbytoad -*- hotmail.co.uk, and we’ll pick a winner in a week or so.
Oh, and please do de-lurk, that’s what this thread is for, y’know. You’ve read the comments before, you know the kind of clowns I’ll be stuck with if you don’t!
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
The Pogues – Bottle of Smoke
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Bob Dylan – Rambling Gambling Willie
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Bruce Springsteen – Meeting Across the River
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Wow…am I finally first
1. Unless entering competitions counts, then apart from a few pennies in slot machines, nowt.
2. the lottery, though I almost never play it
3. The roulette wheel
4. Married, so…reasinably good, I hope!
5. No-one from a TV talent show, for certain. From a story – Maria von Trapp in the sound of music (watch that film again: anti-nazi themes; nuns who wreck nazis cars, shootouts, awesome!!)
From real life…any musician who’s beaten the odds and raised a finger (or two) to the machinations of the music biz, too many to list here and decide on…
1. Yeah, I won around $10 once in a Melbourne Cup sweep. Look out!
2. One where I was guaranteed to win.
3. Cock-fighting
4. I live in a tourist town, and this weekend it’s been flooded with drunken ferals for a bloody bogan yobbo fest. Sounds awesome to some I’m sure… but you haven’t witnessed the bottom-feeding lowlifes that this particular event attracts. Like the rest of the locals, I shall not be leaving my house until Monday morning! So, you know, slim to none.
5. Bloggers. I reckon we’re the underdogs right now.
1. Quite frequently won general knowledge type bets at school. But they were usually of the “Bet you a kabillion dollars, no, pounds, I bet you a flobbity-gillion pounds you’re wrong” variety. I never was, but somehow they never paid up.
2. Strip Happy Families.
3. Most of them. But people who bet on things like Survivour and Big Brother seem especially cracked.
4. Astronomically unlikely. Somewhere on a level with god reaching down from the skies and doodling obscene graffitti on St Peter’s Square while the Pope engages in a three way with the Archbishop of Canterbury and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on the balcony.
5. Malcolm Reynolds.
1. I’ve won some money on the horses on a day out once, but I didn’t want to get too serious about it so bet it all on the last horse of the day and lost the lot. Unsurprisingly I’ve never really felt tempted to try again.
2. Anything card-based always looks incredibly suave in the movies. I have my doubts about real life though.
3. Anything machine based. This is a rule-based device for generating profit, what on earth makes you think you’re going to get anywhere at all with these things.
Also, the National Lottery winds me up – it’s basically tax. And unfortunately, it’s a tax on the inability to understand statistics, and so tends to exploit the less educated more than anyone else. Brilliant.
I also love the fact that the States is going after games like poker, which are demonstrably games of skill, not gambling, on the grounds that gambling is immoral, addictive and exploitative, whilst still allowing state-sponsored lotteries to exist. The double-standard beggars fucking belief.
4. 2:1 if I’m relatively sober, getting better as we get more and more tipsy and then stretching to about 10:1 if we get totally plastered, which is not outwith the bounds of possibility.
5. Eric the Eel was pretty cool, but I think I like that French Amateur League side from Calais who so nearly got to the cup final a couple of years ago make my eyes moisten with pride. Oh, and does Gareth Gates banging Jordan kinda count? Sort of perhaps.
1. Occasionally, in a very small time way – horses in big obvious races, that kind of thing. Nothing to write home about. I confidently predicted John Major would be the next prime minister about three years before it happened after seeing a bunch of tory bigfucks talking on channel 4′s ‘After Dark’ but didn’t getting around to betting on it, which is a little bit of a shame.
2. Not anything especially, most everything in a very minor and occasional way.
3. I can’t imagine ever having the nerve to get involved with the kind of spread betting that can cover such heavy losses.
4. It’s complicated.
5. Us, versus ‘Them’, obviously, and especially now.
Gareth Gates banging Jordan?
Is that Kinda not a bit like a chihuahua (with a bad stutter) trying to bang a great dane?
Oh, and you are definitely right about the national lottery, I get tempted once in a blue moon by the thought it might solve our problems. Sod’s law they’d probably just be beginning…
Agnes, translating for the non-Aussies, ‘bogan’ means ned, pikey, chav, jakey etc etc etc does it not?
1. I’m actually up on the lottery. Only ever one £10, but only play when its a double roll over – you know, because if the jackpot isn’t over £50 million its not worth having – and have won more than 1/10 times so far.
2. I quite enjoy a day out at the dogs or horses. Then gambling very low amounts is all part of the fun with a few pints of cider in hand. Poker nights between friends is always fun as well – and cheaper than a night out.
3. Online poker. Seriously wtf?! You don’t get the fun part of poker with trying to read tells and getting drunk and smoking cigars and being with friends. You just get to lose money. I call bullshit. Same on online Bingo (not that I play any sort of bingo) – but for fuck’s sake – come on people. Also, have you been to whatever that casino is in Edinburgh – its such a depressing place with most people in there just throwing away their savings. Its not Vegas – there’s no glamour. Ughh.
4. Pretty slim as I’m at my Grandad’s 90th birthday party. Great innings so far there gramps! Things might be rather awkward/wrong if I started hitting on anyone there…
5. Hmmmm… I really enjoyed Histon in the FA Cup last year. It was where I was born, and they did really bloody well for what is essentially a village team.
Yes, chav. I know that one!
1. Nearly. When we were kids my mum would let us pick a horse in the Grand National and put 50p on it; obviously we’d just pick whatever funny name we liked. One year I’d picked a horse at 100-1 odds, and in the final straight, unbelievably it was in the lead. My heart was in my mouth as the magnificent beast thundered majestically down that final stretch, and I was already dreaming about how to spend the fifty quid coming my way, when my horse was tripped. By the horse my mum had bet on, and that had lost its rider miles back. Arse.
2. Mud wrestling
3. Craps. Are you really just throwing dice around on a table?!
4. About the same as that horse of mine at the Grand National. No matter how good things look on the final stretch, something will come along and trip me up!
5. Sunday 11th April, 1999. Wales v. England. Wembley Stadium, London (Where Wales are playing their “home” games while the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff is under construction.) The Dying moments of the game, Wales 25-31 down. Welsh attacking line-out in what has to be the final possibility for a constructive passage of play in the game. Wales shorten the line-out. The ball is fed through to the legendary Scotty Gibbs’, whose surgically-precise run slices the flailing England defence open like a scalpel to score the most beautiful, heart-stopping, awe-inspiring try the game has ever seen. 30-31. Wales still need the conversion to win the match. The pressure on the kicker will be immense. Which player from the entire history of the game would you ask to step up? Who else but the great Neil Jenkins.
Agnes, translating for the non-Aussies, ‘bogan’ means ned, pikey, chav, jakey etc etc etc does it not?
How many different ways to say “slack-jawed, glassy-eyed, perpetually inebriated idiot” does one language need ?
1. I have minimal flutters every so often, but rarely win. Never been to a betting shop, though a client of mine waxed lyrical about them this week and made them sound sort of appealing. I’ve won decent chuncks in fruit machines before and a bottle of soap in a raffle. I’ve won twenty quid in a poker game.
2. I’m tempted by most gambling, really. I feel like I’ve just been keeping it in check all these years. Games where I have any feeling of control (however false) appeal as well as games where the wins are frequent enough to keep me amused and reinforce the behaviour. I love playing poker, though just for small stakes. My boss used to be a poker champion and keeps inviting me for “just a wee game among friends” with £50 minimums, which is both ridiculous and sorely appealing.
3. Betting on outcomes is just too difficult, so I stay away from putting money on the next president/christmas no.1 etc. That little bit of knowledge is dangerously seductive. I have absolutely never understood the football pools.
4. Good value at 100 to 1.
5. Barack Obama for prez. I’ve been following him to some extent since he was running for illinois senator (my family home) and it was wonderful watching his 1000 to 1 chance creep up to near certainty.
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
No. I especially regret not betting on Lamtarra winning the Derby. with only 4 races under his belt it was good odds (14-1) but you only needed to look at the bugger to see Sheik wossname had been keeping him under wraps for a reason.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
Grand National Sweeepies in the office.
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
Spread betting. Start a fucking hedge fund why don’t you and gamble with other peoples money?
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
I refer the honourable readers to the post by Mr Toad who will be getting a clip round the ear.
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
Eddie the Eagle.
AnotherDave – when you have as many as we have, you need a lot of words for them; see Eskimos and snow.
1. Not that I can remember. Unless penny falls machines in the arcades count.
2. I daren’t try. I can spend hours and hours playing FreeCell or Minesweeper online; add money to that kind of pathetic addictive tendency and I’d be bankrupt in days.
3. The lottery. Really? You won a tenner once? And how much did you spend prior to that one solitary occasion?
4. Ach. This is a sore subject at the moment. This morning it looked reasonably certain. Now it’s not. Feh.
5. Slightly concerned that the fact that I can’t think of any makes me a heartless bint who always sides with the winner. Tomorrow belongs to me, etc.
If Tim ends up pulling at his Granddad’s 90th I will personally award him a Golden Toad of Excellence!
That’s an urban legend, don’t you know? The Eskimo words for snow thing..
As ponted out in the rather dry Wikipedia entry for the phenomenon.
Although it is interesting to see, under the Origins and Significance heading, that the first Klingon officer in Starfleet is also evidently an expert in Eskimo morphology.
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
I had a good run at Fruit Machine Simulator on the Spectrum back in the day. I could nudge like a motherfucker on that thing. In real life, not so much.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
I’ve oddly never been tempted, tho I did watch that Late Night Poker when it was on Channel 4 on Fridays and thought I might become a dab hand at the ol’ Texas Hold ‘Em, but thought better of it in case I was psychologically bullied by wannabe gangsters. From Hull.
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
Betting on the Rovers (of the Raith variety). Don’t do it kids, we’ll just let you down.
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
Slim to nil. I’ll have more luck playing pick-up sticks with my butt cheeks.
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
27/11/94, Coca Cola Cup Final vs the Green Half of the Twins of Evil. Unthinkable surely for the skipper to miss…
*wipes away tear*…
Sapir was a Klingon?
1. Not that I can remember. But then I lost that in a bet in 2004. Not that that statement makes any sense…
2. Anything which I develop a foolproof method of cheating at.
3. Those machines you get in pubs, with the flashing lights and random bleeps. If you’re going to gamble, at least be able to pretend you’re James Bond.
4. Zero. We haven’t got a match until Monday.
5. The shot-putter who competed in the 100 meters…though I can’t remember if it was in Beijing or Sydney. I think that per kilo he was quicker than Darren Campbell.
1. Yes, marriage.
2. Russian roulette seems pretty cool. All Deer Hunter ‘n shit.
3. Voting Republican.
4. Dark chocolate + doing the dishes = luv.
5. http://api.ning.com/files/-H-5bBctNX4DN-Wz6T2GITGRGitaZ-2a9aohUl0teB*P33kmfgLtH6BVR5RUcseY2NPCKbAyFQd14jS5t1Aixk8LunDnFr0z/underdog.jpg
Sigh. #5 should have been:
http://getsbybuckner.files.wordpress.com/2007/07/underdog.jpg
What’s the difference between Russian Roulette and voting Republican?
Russian Roulette can end well.
I am very, very bored.
1. Quite a few, but one particular office sweep sticks in the mind. I got David Beckham as first scorer/last scorer, England v Argentina, 2002 World Cup. Beckham scores his penalty and I’m feeling pretty chuffed with myself, but then I realise that I could collect the whole pot (about £100) if no one else scores. I can tell you as a Scotsman, I’ve never felt more conflicted!
2. Baseball and college football. At the beginning of the 2003 season, I put the remaining balance from my Paddy Power account on the Marlins to win the World Series at 100-1. They won, but the balance was 50p. Winning isn’t as sweet when you wish you’d stuck even a tenner on it.
3. Slot machine bandits. There’s absolutely nothing compelling about it, and yet wherever you find them, there’s always some, slack-jawed, unwashed loser mindlessly pumping coins in. Oh yeah, and I never seem to be able to figure out how to play puggies. It’s like some secret world.
4. I’m at Vampire Weekend that night, so probably not great.
5. Scotland at anything. Always had a soft spot for Oakland As of the late 90s, even before I’d read ‘Moneyball’. I like the idea of a ball club fighting rich competitors with cheap, clever signings. Lower league football could learn a lot from Billy Beane.
I never understood fruit machines either.
I used to work in pubs, the engineers from the fruit machine company come round, open up the front of the machine, take all the money out, and set the percentage proportion of cash put in it will pay back out!
It’s generally set at around 70%. So the best way to play them is to go up once, play once and then fuck off – win or lose.
The longer you stand there, and the more money you put in, the more and more you increase your chances of only get 70% of your total stake back!
Ever wonder why those addicts you see in the pub never leap in the air and holler for joy when they finally drop the £50 jackpot on those machines? They’ve had to feed around eighty quid in to get it!
1) er no.. I won a competition in Kerrang magazine about 12 years ago, but that’s not really gambling is it?
2) I have occasionally impulse-bought lottery scratchcards during drunken visits to the 24 hour garage. I have to say that, given my total aversion to work of any form, I do like to indulge in the notion of winning a shitload of money on the lottery and never having to lift a finger again. Saying that, I don’t think a middle-class person has ever won the lottery. My dad has been doing four lines a week since it started and hasn’t even won a tenner.
3) anything to do with football sickens and confuses me in equal measures.
4) absolutely nil. My girlfriend’s grandparents are staying with us for the weekend. This is not funny.
5) Didn’t Belle and Sebastian win a Brit award because their fans did.. er.. something to do with phones? Yeah that’ll do.
1. No, always tried accumulators but frankly I’ve never been anywhere close – I have friends would have made thousands but only by waging huge amounts for little gain, I suppose I want the instant gratification of winning big quickly, though my betting is rather infrequent thesedays.
2. I did a road trip around the east coast of the States after working on a summer camp and ended up in Atlantic City (incidentally, it’s a shit hole, Blackpool with more sun and desperation). Though I went into one of the casinos and had a go at a Wheel of Fortune puggie type things. Put in $5 and won $115 by just pressing buttons without any logic. Decided that might be the only time anyone left AC with winnings so got up and left. Bought my motel room for the night, some trainers and jeans and felt pretty good about it…until my car got towed and had to pay $80 to get it back
3. The machines. They are ways of winning money (see above) but frankly I have no idea how they work!
4. 100/1 – going to see Pearl & The Puppets at CabVol with friends but I can’t imagine romance on the cards
5. Eric the Eel (Olympic swimmer)
1. I think one of my fluttees on the National last year was placed, does that count?
2. None really. Apart from my once-a-year flutter on the National, on something with a comedy name (and even then I have to get Wilf to place it cos I’m scared of betting shops) it’s not really something I go in for.
3. As above. The house always wins.
4. That’s a bit personal, isn’t it Matthew?
5. Jeremy Bates
You’re not acting all surprised because I’ve asked an inappropriate question are you I Are?
1. I have bet on pretty much most things, and won a fair amount, and lost some!
2. I kind of like all gambling – it gives an edge to things, whether a sporting event, a saturday night(statistics my arse – i believe in fate, i am meant to be a millionare!) the amount of covers we have done in the pub!
3. The kind that bankrupts you – show some restraint losers!
4. I’m working a double shift – so naff all!
5. Scotland!
1) I won my office USA! USA! USA! Football pool one week by going online and finding out who the experts picked. I felt so dirty I never played again.
2) I do enjoy poker.
3) I went to a Casino once and it was the most depressing place on earth. The heady scent of desperation and the neon lights made me sick to my stomach.
4) Working. No sex at work.
5) The Montreal Expos. A baseball team that played against big rich American teams, fielded almost exclusively young kids from the Dominican Republic (until big teams poached them), played baseball with heart and passion. There would be a great movie about them except that the season they were going to have their ‘Miracle’ moment baseball shut down all together and cancelled the play-offs in a stunt to make rich teams richer and change the rules so that players could leave poor teams like the Expos sooner for a big payout. There are no miracles in real life. Just the relentless grind of capitalism exploiting the poor. And in the end isn’t that what organised gambling is really all about.
1. I’ve won a few quid and lost a few quid on the horses, I used to work on the bars at Musselburgh Racecourse and saw too many people lose too much money to take it seriously.
2. Snail Racing sounds like fun.
3. Betting on Big Brother and the sorts.
4. I don’t pay any attention to valentines day so the odds are the same to any other day.
5. The Mighty Ducks.
There’s not going to be a lot of fornicating amongst the Toadlings this VD is there? What an awfully chaste/useless bunch we are.
Snail racing I think I could enjoy.
“Go snail! Yay snail! Faster snail! No wait, faster, get a move on, he’s catching you…” And then longest slow-motion noooooooooooo…! in history!
I like the thought of painting the racing number on the snails shell, is that mean?
And you can always stamp on/cook them if they’re shit. I am picturing some hilarious tantrums on the part of the losing snail trainers.
I’m waiting for Becky to get on here and say the were all betting on the pissed worm racing.
http://www.nooooooooooooooo.com/
1. yes & no. I went to the races with a gambling friend. I put a 5quid bet ‘each way’ on a horse. not realising this costs 10quid. the horse came second & I got 7.50 back. note to self: don’t try gambling again.
2. Cards if I could ever retain the knowledge required to play for any longer than I sit at the table.
3. Its all a black art to me.
4. I’m married so i reckon 50/50
5. Subo….or Rocky.
That Noooo button is a completely brilliant total waste of time!
Actually Susan Boyle scores very highly in my Favourite Underdogs category. I never paid attention to the rest of the circus, but when you’ve the entire nation queueing up to snigger at you, as she did when she first appeared, to be able to stick it reet up the bastards with such style is pretty brilliant actually.
By some weird coincidence a plain looking woman from a small town just wow’d everyone on Simon Cowell’s “America Has Talent”. Shocking how these things happen eh?
I don’t really have the attention span for cards either.
There’s that thing isn’t there; when you have to ask who’s turn it is, you can be sure it’s yours.
I watched Andy Nonimage make a similar mistake at the bar last night after Tape Club: turning to his mates and asking whose round it was.
1. I bet on basketball when I was in school, I won $7 and then told my Mum who forced me to give it back to teach me about the wrongs of gambling I guess (why do I remember $7 20 something years later).
2. Most kinds so actually none of them, self preservation pretty much keeps me away.
3. Post club night out casino visits. Reasonable folk that will sober still swear it’s good fun and not at all risky to go while drunk.
4. Nil, to make sure I plan on staying inside away from the cloying couples.
5. The Saints, awesome! A long time coming.
Oooooh – a Golden Toad of Excellence – better pack my A-game. You never know, I could be on Jeremy Kyle this time next week.
So… first time for me:
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
I have never actually put any money on anything. It’s kinda like going to a strip bar, my gender dictates I should do it but I just don’t see the point.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
Something that involves vertically challenged people, I’d imagine.
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
The kind where people have ‘systems’. Seriously, what the fuck is that all about? You hear the words ‘I’ve got a systeem’, you know your talking to a man who’s watching his life flush down the tubes like a turd.
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
Good, if those painters don’t decide to do some decorating…
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
Paul Bearer. not really an underdog but i always wanted the best for him. He’s got a curious poker face… difficult to read: http://www.armpitwrestling.com/image-files/paul-bearer-2.jpg
Tim
Do you have Matlock in the UK? If so Tim, just pack a DVD box set and you’ll be golden!
1. I’ve won a few times with footie coupons & horses. Even on fruit machines. My favourite is the time on a day of drinking we visited 3 pubs and I took the jackpot out of the puggie in each one. Possibly the only time I’ve came home with more money than I went out with.
NO WAIT! Do bets with pals count? I once won £100 because a couple of pals bet me I couldn’t drink a bottle of HP Sauce. For that amount of money Hell yes I could drink it.
2. Poker in some kind of swanky Casino looks good in films. I’d probably accidentally win, offend someone and be marked for death by the Russian maffia or something though. I’d also neck another bottle of sauce if the money was right.
3. Accumulators. Trifectas. Horse and dog betting that you only seem to understand when you are an old bloke, or a compulsive gambler.
4. Absolute Zero.
5. Well, Plentyside brought up a painful memory earlier. The Cleveland Indians from Major League maybe.
5.
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
I have twice had a strange dream the night before the grand national with my dream roughly associated with the name of a horse (the one I remember was Last suspect after a dream about being theonly one getting away with some mischeivious event) and in both cases won money but not lots as I didn’t have the faith.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
none really, I don’t like giving money away
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
Slot machines, what is the bleeding point. Once went on holiday with some mates and within 2 days one of them had spent his entire budget on the damn things and we had to lend him cash for the rest of the week, TWAT.
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
Good. ?
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
Spartans FC every year the Scottish cup comes calling (they were robbed by Airdrie last year).
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
I’m now 2 for 2 in the office North American football pools that I’ve entered, which has netted me $90 (i.e. enough to feed my two kids for the year). All of this is remarkable since I know nowt about any sort of football.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
Foreign liquors I’ve never tried before.
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
Saturday night bingo. Name me something that reeks more of solitude and desperation, and I’ll give you a tin of mushy peas.
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
Ah, Valentine’s Day is coming up? Must have a word with Dearest Wife…
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
Lordi. Eurovision 2006 – The Arockalypse!!! \m/
Listening to new Meursault album, fresh from Neil’s frantic mixing.
1. Ever bet on anything and won?
A bloke I use to work with was forever going to a nearby bookies. One night before leaving he asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10 “6″ I replied, before shooting off out the door to the bookies. Ten minutes later he returned. “Good choice” he said before handing me a crisp £20 note. I never did ask him what he betted on though. I was too afraid.
2. Which kind of gambling might you be tempted by?
Drunken tramps chasing a can of carlsberg special
3. Kind of gambling you’ll never understand.
the deer hunter kind
4. What are your odds of scoring on Valentine’s Day?
onehundredandtenfuckinpercent..ahahahahaha
5. Name your favourite underdog of all time (doesn’t matter what field).
Rowdy Roddy Piper
1. I went to a friend’s birthday party once which involved going to Walthamstow Dog Track. We met Vinnie Jones there (by chance, it wasn’t a particularly well-organised birthday party) and he gave us a tip for one of the dogs. We won. I kid you not.
2. Blackjack. It seems relatively easy.
3. Roulette. Too many variables!
4. Tip-top. I hope.
5. Bing (as opposed to Google). I don’t mean favourite as in I support it, I just find it amusing.