Song, by Toad


Song, by Toad’s Friday Fives, Back on Fresh Air

 As the more cunning of you might have noticed last week, Song, by Toad’s Friday Fives is now a radio show on Fresh Air, as well as just a means for you to waste your time on the internet on a Friday afternoon.

This means that from 3:30pm Brian Pokora and myself will be live on the radio, with some sort of attempt made to avoid the dreary old pish I would usually pick, out of respect for the fact that this is officially pre-pub radio and you probably want cheering up rather than bringing down.

Live on air from 3:30pm – listen here.

Also, there are a couple of live gigs to remind you about this weekend, including some late news which will hopefully be rather interesting for you.

Firstly, we have The Last Battle, Dad Rocks and Shoes & Socks Off at Henry’s tomorrow night.  It is only a fiver in, and those who come along will also be able to get into the second show of the night, which is as follows:

Secondly, Lach is opening for Viv Albertine (of The Slits) at Henry’s after our gig there on Saturday, and anyone who is there for the Ides of Toad night will get in for £4.

Thirdly, on Sunday in Anstruther we’ll be hosting a Song, by Toad all-dayer called Flamin’ Hott Toadzzz! at the Hew Scott Hall.  The lineup will be Avital Raz, Dan Mutch, Yusuf Azak, Jesus H. Foxx, Jonnie Common and Meursault, and tickets will be available on the door.

And on Monday I will sleep.

Today’s pointless questions for the internets.  Remember, fives first, pish-talking later.

1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.
2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.
3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.
4. Favourite type of weather.
5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?

Playlist for Song, by Toad’s Friday Fives will appear below as we play stuff:
1. The Piranhas – Getting Beaten Up
2. Dad Rocks! – Aroused By Hair
3. Youth Lagoon – Posters
4. Tom Waits – Goin’ Out West
5. Easter – Somethin’ American
6. Dolfinz – Hot Pants
7. The Twilight Sad – Kill it in the Morning
8. Dead Kennedys – Holiday in Cambodia
9. John Cooper Clarke – Gimmix
10. Yuck – Holing Out
11. Lil Daggers – Dada Brown
12. Horsecollar – Christopher
13. Other Lives – For 12
14. Blur – To the End (with Francoise Hardy)

53 witty ripostes to Song, by Toad’s Friday Fives, Back on Fresh Air

  1. avatar
    rampant chutney consumerism

    1. well not a one i saw them buy, but i bought my mother the debut album by katie melua, oh boy she wouldn’t stop playing the crock of shite!
    2. The Best of John Denver
    3. Kate Nash at the roundhouse (tickets were free needless to say)
    4. i kinda like walking around the countryside on a foggy day
    5. go on have another beer!

  2. avatar

    1. The Lighthouse Family? Eros Ramzotti? My Mum is responsible for some right clunkers.
    2. I provide them with a lot of new music, but they independently asked about Elbow. And my mum thinks Yusuf Azak and Rob St. John are awesome, which isn’t bad going.
    3. The Fratellis, really early in their careers. They were pish and the gig was full of kids. And they were the Fratellis.
    4. Fucking cold and snowing.
    5. Oh shush.

  3. 1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy
    The father has pretty solid taste, and all I can say is thank god my mom doesn’t actually buy music. Her radio is constant latin radio of the Juanes/ Enrique Iglesias variety.

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    My dad and I are constantly swapping music, be it Manu Chao, Beirut, Dr. Draw. Basically any time I actually go home, there is a day of harddrive swapping. Not identical tastes, but there is definite respect.

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.
    Korn concert during the rebellious teenage years.

    4. Favourite type of weather.
    Just before it rains during the fall, when the humidity makes it warmer and the muted skies play off the brightly coloured Autumn leaves.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?
    I’d hand it over to friends with various fantastic accents and have them teach it to swear.

  4. avatar

    1. My mum bought Il Divo (and not the Sorrention film), but it could have been worse, I guess.
    2. My dad bought Hollywood Townhall (on my recommendation). When I was a kid he had Sgt Pepper and a couple of Queen live tapes and I thought that was pretty cool.
    3. I went to Stu ‘I Could Crush A Grape’ Francis in the Volunteer Hall, Gala. It wasn’t really a concert, though.
    4. I like my days the way I like my German lager: very cold, very clear, very crisp.
    5. ‘Ice Cream’ in the style of Speedball II.

  5. avatar

    The Lighthouse Family, Enrique Iglesias, Il Divo and Katie Melua. Ouch.

  6. avatar

    1. Not sure where to start with this, Whitney Houston – The Bodyguard Soundtrack seems a good place though

    2. My old man bought Bloc Party – Silent Alarm. I’m pretty sure it was just to impress me, and he still flicks it on when I’m in the car

    3. I went to see Rooster play when I was at uni. I didn’t pay for the ticket at least

    4. Snow, but only when I’m somewhere it can be utilised

    5. Ed Sheeran must die

  7. avatar
    rampant chutney consumerism

    is it 3 or 3:30 that i have to avoid the radio from?

  8. avatar

    1. Probably a Shania Twain album my mum loved, or a Black Eyed Peas album, even she thought it was shit. My dad’s got pretty good taste in music.

    2. Rory Gallagher – Irish Tour or a Hendrix album, when I first realised my dad’s quite cool. And bigger than your dad.

    3. Bon Jovi at Ibrox, my first gig.

    4. Anything except wind and rain, I love sunny but freezing winter days.

    5. The Bill Pullman speech from Independence Day.

  9. avatar

    Ed Sheeran really does need to go, doesn’t he. Utterly baffling piles of wank.

    Sorry Chutters, it’s half three for the radio thing – I’ve changed the thingy in the post.

  10. avatar

    1. Hard to say but it could definitely be filed under “Generic Middle-aged Pish”
    2. I didn’t see the purchase but my Mum has an original first pressing of the Beatles first album having seen them quite a few times before they were famous.
    3. I saw Steps at the SECC. But I’m not embarrassed, they were ace.
    4. The most rain ever. As long as it’s of limited duration. Or the most snow ever. As long as there are big hills nearby.
    5. I second that emotion.

  11. avatar

    Also, your website still thinks it’s British Summer Time.

  12. avatar

    Yeah, you have to change the timezone manually, which is a tedious pain in the tits, so I tend not to bother as diligently as I should.

    “my Mum has an original first pressing of the Beatles first album having seen them quite a few times before they were famous.” Fuck me, that’s amazing!

  13. avatar

    It is but I’m sick of hearing her going on about it. Especially as here taste in modern music leads me to believe her taste as a teenager was just a happy accident.

  14. avatar

    1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.

    An embarrassment of riches here. Mum has terrible taste in music, Dad claims to a be a big music fan but his tastes are quite middle of the road. I’m going to go for a Raul Malo (him off the Mavericks) album that my Mum bought. Shocking.

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.

    My Dad owns a Jenny Lewis album, but only because I bought him it. I’ve been given the picks of their old vinyl collection, a few Stones and classic-era Stevie Wonder albums, not much else really.

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.

    One of my old school pals roped me into seeing the Corrs in the mid 90s (pre-massive fame). He bought my ticket and everything, just because he didn’t want to go by himself. The novelty of “gosh, she’s pretty” wore off pretty quickly.

    4. Favourite type of weather.

    This time last year I would have said snowfall but the shine’s rather been taken off that after THE WINTER FROM HELL. So I’ll say a crisp autumn day.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?

    “Polly wanna finger”

  15. avatar

    The Winter from hell? Are you ‘avin’ a larf?

  16. avatar

    Smokies greatest hits

    Johnny cash live at st quentin

    Loads of bad ones but I think Phil Collins wins

    Big snow

    Was that you?

  17. avatar

    Stu, you’ve obviously never been to anywhere it gets properly cold. Although I feel like it would be wasted on you. In these days of Global Warming™ they’re going to have to be rationed.

  18. avatar

    1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.

    well, my parents were listening to different types of music, all of them of the local music scene, so i guess that if i told you you wouldn’t know any of them.

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.

    i never saw them bying something cool, but lots of years back i discovered some home made tapes that included Paul Anka, The Beatles, Frank Sinatra, Cock Robin, A-ha. classics, and i still fancy that kind of music.
    they know nothing about today’s music, they’re not really into music anymore.

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.

    very proud to say none. oh yes.

    4. Favourite type of weather.

    rain. grey cold days. occasional snow. waking up at 6.30am and it’s dark outside. every day of the year that it gets dark early in the afternoon. i love the smell of wet soil. and i love going to work in my winter coat and scarf.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?
    eh…don’t worry.

  19. avatar

    I’m merely quoting my ‘friends’ in the media. It was like the apocalypse was upon us.

  20. avatar

    I was embarrassed for Adam Ant last year…that was a car crash

  21. avatar

    Incidentally, surely the WINTER FROM HELL would be really hot, no?

  22. avatar

    Do none of us actually like hot sunny days?

    What a bunch of fucking weirdos.

  23. avatar

    Steve – How about Oslo in January? It was about -20. The best bit was Norway’s smoking ban (this was ’04) which meant that Mrs L had to brave those temperatures to go light up while I remained cosy inside with my £8 pint.


  24. avatar

    -20 PAH! I was once skiing in freezing fog and it was -30. Which is really pretty chilly (and about my limit – I was in Ottawa a couple of years ago when it was -25 and you basically has to keep moving at all times when outside to avoid instant ice death). In both cases, I would have quite smoking in a second has I found myself needing to go outside to just stand still.

  25. avatar

    Incidentally, ended up reading and this week which has slightly lessened my love of cold. Although it’s still better than hot.

  26. avatar

    Yeah, Mrs. Toad basically quit smoking because she didn’t want to have to stand in the rain outside pubs just to have a fag.

  27. avatar

    1. The Susan Boyle album. It was the only thing my dad wanted for Christmas.

    2. Didn’t really see it, but my dad had The Diamond Dog album which I discovered when I was very, very little. Anorexic dog David Bowie has haunted my dreams since I was three.

    3. Barry Manilow. Thanks mom and dad for not just letting me stay in the car.

    4. I really like cold rainy days when I’m able to curl up with a good book and a cup of coffee.

    Pleasantly warm nights and balconies or rooftops are nice as well.

    5. It’s not complete crap.

  28. avatar

    I don’t know much about what she was like on the rest of the show, but after seeing her first audition I am inclined to rather admire Susan Boyle.

  29. avatar

    1. My folks aren’t very into music anymore, so there’s nothing that dreadful, maybe the odd dodgy compilation album bought from Tesco, but nothing that makes me disown them.

    2. Nothing that cool that I’ve seen them buying, but there’s a couple of old Johnny Cash albums kicking about from when they were both younger, and they were big on Abba.

    3. I have no shame, I’m not even embarrassed at having done some crowd surfing at a Limp Bizkit gig.

    4. Warm, but pissing down with really heavy rain. Good for going on an overly dramatic head clearing walk in.

    5. In the tradition of body swap comedies, “Help, I’m a man who is under a spell, a parrot is in my body shagging my wife”

  30. avatar

    Ah Limp Bizkit. As terrible as I know they are, I recall seeing them at a festival and being a little sucked in…

  31. avatar

    With stuff like Limp Bizkit, which is basically just pantomime, I can well imagine that if just basically just go for it then it would be tremendous fun to be at a gig, even if you do feel slightly soiled afterwards.

  32. avatar

    It was tremendous sweaty drunken fun. Wouldn’t want to do it again right enough, but it was fab at the time.

  33. avatar

    Susan Boyle has a very lovely voice! But it’s a weird album because she’s a good singer but doesn’t do anything with the songs other than sing them. She covers Madonna’s “We’ll See” as sweet as can be, and that’s the problem because it’s a bitter, bitter break up song. The situation is musical equivalent of people who went out and bought PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES and that’s why its embarrassing.

  34. avatar
    Ian (HFAD)

    If any of you scallys can’t make it to Anstruther then you should come to the zine and record fair happening at Teviot. 11-5. I will be there repping for the Toad. I will even let you touch my moustache.!/event.php?eid=113958738715343

  35. avatar

    1) Same as Toad. Can’t beat Eros Ramazotti!
    2) The Pogues ‘If I should fall from Grace with God”. And he introduced is to Bob Dyland and Tom Waits. My Mum on the other hand has the second most comprehensive collection of symphonic and opera recordings I’ve ever seen. And good stuff too, none of you ‘Pavarotti Sings the Classics’.
    3) Meat Loaf. It was also, by some distance, the most awesome!
    4) Bracingly cold with bright bright sun. And some snow on the ground.
    5) Talk to the bird ‘cos the human ain’t listening!

  36. avatar

    Pride and Prejudice with Zombies was fucking awful. Mrs. Toad bought it and even with her lowbrow taste she found it crap.

  37. avatar

    ” Bracingly cold with bright bright sun. And some snow on the ground.” <--This.

  38. avatar
    Ian (HFAD)

    1. My mum likes Mr Hudson
    2. My dad is the biggest Withered Hand fan

    3. Oasis gig
    4. Crisp cold nights, because lots of music works well with it.

    5. I remember my Grandad’s parrot used to make the noise of the close door slamming, so you always thought someone was coming in/leaving. I found that pretty funny.

  39. avatar

    I’m quite enjoying P&P&Z I must say. Very silly but quite amusing.

  40. avatar

    1. Not seen them buy it, but there’s a Michael Bolton album lurking down there somewhere.

    2. My dad likes a decent range of stuff, he’s got a few punk albums (Sex Pistols, Stiff Little Fingers, The Clash, The Jam), a few Biffy albums, some Motown stuff, and my mum absolutely adores Springsteen.

    3. Probably gonna have to be Hadouken! when I was about 15. I thought I was really cool because I liked “nu-rave”

    4. Today is nice, a bit drizzly, a light breeze, not too hot and not too cold. I definitely prefer the cold though.

    5. I am an ugly little bird.

  41. avatar

    Snow is wonderful. I was a little dismayed to see it showing up in October but it’s still wonderful.

  42. avatar

    Michael Bolton is pretty close to being today’s winner!

  43. avatar

    Oh wait. I’ve thought of a more embarrassing one. Will Young at T in the Park. We watched the whole thing.

  44. avatar

    OUCH! That is quite bad. Not sure if it’s worse than The Fratellis, but it’s pretty bad.

  45. 1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    Dad had pretty solid taste, Mom leans more toward rock ballads and pretty songs, some okay, some icky.

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    Lots: steppenwolf, dire straits, lee michaels…

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.
    38 Special and Heart, when I was very young and had never heard anything remotely “alternative”. However, I still stick to my belief that Heart’s Dreamboat Annie is a nice piece of music before they went all 80s yuck.

    4. Favourite type of weather.
    Spring or fall, just right warm and sunny, 75ish, occasional light rain… Basically, not too cold and not too hot.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?
    Put your (toys/shoes/coats/crap) away!

  46. avatar

    1. My mother owns several Cliff Richard albums.
    2. My dad had a few Johnny Cash albums along with a Ramones album.
    3. King………makes me cringe just thinking about it
    4. It use to be rain but as I get older I definetly want more sunshine.
    5. Fuck the hertz!

    P.S. Bad As Me is an excellent album best vinyl purchase of the year… far

  47. avatar

    A LOT of Johnny Cash-loving parents, it seems. Which is as it should be.

  48. avatar

    Johnny Cash loving parents make Johnny Cash loving children. You still can’t make it through a visit with Dad without Dad singing Delia.

  49. avatar

    1. Julie Andrews sings Christmas – so wrong, on so many levels.
    2. The Beatles White album.
    3. Fairly recently, in Edinburgh, an American woman who started off brilliantly with country songs and, still singing country songs, weirdly became more and more like by Britney Spears by the minute – NO, jet lag is not an excuse!
    4. I do prefer the cold. Probably to do with being born in Fife…
    5. My parrot would sit on my shoulder at gigs and remain silent unless anyone started at conversation during the music at which point it would stare at those involved in such a hideous act and sqwack loudly “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” (in Toad’s accent).

  50. avatar
    Campfires & Battlefields

    1. Rod Stewart singing standards.
    2. My father brought home a sweet Leadbelly compilation from a thrift store once.
    3. Loverboy, although it’s only embarrassing in retrospect. At the time, I was thrilled.
    4. When it rains screech

  51. avatar

    I’m late here, but I posed the questions as dinner conversation.

    For #5 my 14 y.o. shot out “Shut the Fuck Up”.

    I’m still laughing and since we are all Toad fans…how appropriate.

  52. avatar

    1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    ‘how to strip for your husband’

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    I never actually saw them buy an album. We had them around the house though.

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.
    Why would a gig be embarrassing?

    4. Favourite type of weather.
    The one with air in it.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?
    Gabba-Gabba, We Accept Ya, One Of Us!

  53. avatar

    I know it’s very late but my week feels incomplete if I don’t participate:

    1. Most shameful album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    None they’re deaf.

    2. Coolest album you’ve seen your parents buy.
    None. They’re deaf. Didn’t you hear that first time?

    3. Most embarrassing gig you’ve been to.
    Prodigy. Left at the start. It was a freebie.

    4. Favourite type of weather.
    Warm spring. Don’t like it when it gets too hot.

    5. If you had a parrot, what would teach it to say?
    Looking foxy

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