Please Help Us Collect For the Lifeboats


As you may know by now, every year Mrs. Toad manages the lifeboats collection in Stockbridge, and every year we try and bribe you into coming and helping us to collect money for what rather shockingly remains a volunteer service. This year the collection is on Saturday 27th April, and we’d be really grateful if you were to volunteer to come along and help out.

Whilst the goodness of your heart would be appreciated, we don’t expect you to help us out for that reason alone of course, and we will bribe you with booze and food. Mrs. Toad generally both bakes and cooks a roast dinner, and there is hardly any kind of occasion where we don’t lay on plenty of wine, so you will be well-treated, we can promise you that. ¬†There’s no need to over-stress yourselves either, as all we ask is that you come along and shake a tin in Stockbridge for an hour or so at some point during the day. Generally pretty girls seem to work best, although once one of our pals turned up with his wee baby and he was a stone cold hit, but even socially awkward men with beards are more than welcome – we’ll basically take any and all help we can get.

So let you know if you think you’ll come down, just so we know how many we’ll be feeding and how much wine to lay on. ¬†Thanks in advance.

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