The Muppets win at everything.  That’s all I have to say on the matter.

In other news, Mrs. Toad and I went out into the garden this weekend, to try and tackle the small jungle which has slowly been developing since the Summer.  The weather has been so spectacularly shit since July and August that we just haven’t been out there, so our window boxes have all died and every bed was overrun with weeds.

Still, due to our particularly indelicate methods of gardening – a little closer to slash and burn than anything you might see on Gardeners’ World – we managed to get through an awful lot and also to shove some rather late bulbs into the ground, albeit more in hope than expectation.  It was nice though, especially because we haven’t been out there for months now.  Although fuck knows what we’re going to with all the piles of cuttings and various other crap we generated.

Anyway, after the extreme rock ‘n’ roll of a spot of gardening, I’m not sure that booze and drugs and gigs will impress me all that much.  But let’s give it a go, eh…

Thursday 2nd Feb: Born to Be Wide Festival Seminar at the Electric Circus.

The guests for this one include Dave Corbet (T In The Park/The Edge Festival), Katch Holmes (Knockengorroch Festival), Gordon Reilly (Insider Festival), Shaun Arnold (Go North). So if you want to know how best to get on festival bills and to hear some chat about what it can actually do for you, then I strongly recommend you come to this one.

Thursday 2nd Feb: Lady North play Sick Note at Cabaret Voltaire.

This is a late night club show, and I actually think this might be one of the best ways to experience Lady North’s thumping rhythms and hypnotic guitars.  And for those of you getting soused at Born to Be Wide ealier, then this would be an ideal place to stagger onto next.

Saturday 4th Feb: Love Your Library Day at Penicuik Library, with The Last Battle and Matt Norris and the Moon.

Ed from 17 Seconds has organised a couple of great events for National Libraries Day.  The first is a comedy night involving Frankie Boyle and Miles Jupp, but that’s sold out now, and the second is a musical event out in Penicuik, with a couple of 17 Seconds Records bands.  The 37, 47 or X47 will take you there really easily from the centre of Edinburgh, so I don’t want any whinging excuses about the enormity of the journey, it’s just not that hard.

Sunday 5th Feb: Dam Mantle plays Superclub at Sneaky Pete’s.

Dam Mantle is probably on the fringes of my taste for electronic music, truth be told, but for those of you with better knowledge of this kind of stuff I reckon this should be a very good bet.

So, this week ends with a massive extravaganza of Toadliness, but it does look like it’ll be relatively quiet along the way as there doesn’t seem to be that much else around until the weekend.  Which is actually alright, sort of, because it gives me a chance to get my shit together in advance of a very busy weekend indeed.

Quite how we’re going to sort the logistics of getting half the bands in Edinburgh to and from Anstruther on Sunday I don’t know, but I am sure we’ll manage somehow.

Anyhow, in the meantime there are obviously good gigs on the weekend of course, but I reckon the dark horse is tonight at Henry’s, where Boston band hearts!attack are playing.

[Edit: fucking hell, what a tool, I managed to miss Kid Canaveral and King Creosote tomorrow at the Liquid Room, and Born to Be Wide Radio Seminar on Thursday at the Electric Circus.  And no-one pulled me up on it - do none of you fuckers read this at all?]

Monday 31st October 2011: Hearts!Attack, The Lovely Eggs & Viennetta at Henry’s Cellar Bar.

Some variations on guitar pop going on here, with rough-around-the-edges hearts!attack coming over from Boston, faux-naif you’ve-got-to-be-fucking-having-me-on indie pop from Manchester in the form of the Lovely Eggs, and new(ish – I think!) Edinburgh/Glasgow band Viennetta, who have apparently emerged from some sort of fragments of The Ray Summers and The Damn Shames. Intriguing.

Hearts!attack – If You Were Dead

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Saturday 5th November 2011: The Last Battle, Dad Rocks! & Shoes and Socks Off play the Ides of Toad at Henry’s Cellar Bar.

Our next Ides of Toad night features the ever-changing lineup of Edinburgh band The Last Battle, along with touring Icelander Dad Rocks! and touring partner Shoes and Socks Off.  Dad Rocks! have a new album out around about now as well, so this’ll be your chance to get hold of a copy.

Dad Rocks! – Aroused By Hair

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Saturday 5th November 2011: PET single launch, with Conquering Animal Sound and Pumajaw at the Voodoo Rooms.

I was fully intending to pretend this gig wasn’t happening, what with it clashing with the Ides of Toad and all, but it’s too good a lineup.  So if any of you are misguided enough not to be at Henry’s for our gig, then this is where you should be. But you’ll all be at ours right.  Right?

PET – What You Building?

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Sunday 6th November 2011: Flamin’ Hott Toadzzz! in the Hew Scott Hall, Anstruther.

Alright, maybe this is in Anstruther rather than Edinburgh, but Fence asked me to put together the lineup for this all-dayer, so it is full half with Toad favourites and half with Fence crowd-pleasers. There will be bangers and mash being served upstairs at the AIA Hall as well, apparently, just to add to the splendidness.

Sunday 6th November 2011: King Charles at Sneaky Pete’s.

King Charles is a bit of a weird one, part acoustic smart-arsery, part spiky, lively pop. I don’t know that much about him, but he was a big favourite of a friend of mine called Chris Imlach who used to do an excellent new music show on Fresh Air when I first started, so it’s nice to see him playing here again – and more excellent booking from Sneaky Pete’s.

King Charles – Love/Lust

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 Apart from the gig stuff happening this week, I will be on this panel in Glasgow tomorrow. It is about the use of social media in music, and although I am not entirely certain quite how qualified I am to give actual advice, I do notice for example that our social media-based stuff for the record label tend to yield a lot more interest than our mailing list, so I guess there are a few things to talk about.

And then on Saturday we’ll be recording a Toad Session with the truly awesome PAWS.  Quite how we’re going to get away with the enormous racket they make I have no real idea, but umm… well, we’ll see, won’t we.  Fortunately Philip sings quite loud, so hopefully we won’t just end up with drums in everything.

However, for those of you who care not for Toad Sessions, nor indeed for social media seminars, here are some more traditional musical diversions for you over the next seven days.

Monday 19th September 2011: Slow Club & The Last Battle at Cabaret Voltaire.

If you can’t enjoy yourself at a Slow Club gig it must simply be because you are incapable of fun and therefore not a very worthwhile person. Their tunes are infallibly catchy, the band themselves seem to have a brilliant time playing and they are also obviously incredibly nice people, and that makes their gigs even better! And for a band who perform with simply dual vocals, guitar and a very, very stripped back drum kit they don’t half make a racket when they want to.

Slow Club – Let’s Fall Back in Love

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Wednesday 21st September 2011: North Atlantic Oscillation, Miaoux Miaoux & Discopolis play Limbo at the Voodoo Rooms.

Another solid Scottish lineup from Limbo, who are approaching their fourth birthday as promoters, somewhat incredibly.

Saturday 24th September 2011: The Tidal Wave of Indifference presents Star Wheel Press, French Wives, The Douglas Firs and Lost Telegrams at the Wee Red Bar.

Stu from Tidal Wave of Indifference has slipped his head into the gig promotion noose, and I intend to be along to kick away the stool this Saturday. It’s an ambitious, four-band lineup with strong acoustic pop sensibilities running through it, but quite big sounds nevertheless.  Should be good, and I will be there!  Somewhat pished after recording the PAWS session, I would imagine, but there nevertheless.

The Douglas Firs – The Quickening

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Another week, another bank holiday in which we self-employed folks don’t get to indulge.  Working for yourself is great, but watching everyone else get days off when all you can do is stare at the steady trickle into your inbox and the pile of promotional copies of releases waiting to be posted, can be a little demoralising.  And it’s sunny, too.  Fuckers.

Anyhow, The Brainlove Festival was bloody good fun, only slightly ruined by an awful football match.  My personal highlight was an absolutely awesome set by Mat Riviere.  He was playing with a cellist whose name I unfortunately don’t remember, but the stuff they played was absolutely brilliant – building from beautiful melodies to aggressively experimental cacophonies.

The Brixton Windmill also ended up being good to its description: a highly unpromising building which actually turned out to be a cracking wee venue.  I want one here please.

Tuesday 31st May 2011: The Travelling Band, Jesus H. Foxx and The Last Battle at the Electric Circus.

I harassed the Travelling Band at SXSW this year because one of them happened to be wearing a ‘Homegame 2006*’ t-shirt.  Anyone who’s been asked to play Homegame (and is loved by Cloud Sounds) is good enough for me, plus this gig sees the long-awaited return from mothballs of Jesus H. Foxx, complete with a near-finished new album and a somewhat tweaked lineup.

The Travelling Band – Fairweather Friends

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Wednesday 1st June 2011: eagleowl, The Scottish Enlightenment & Silver Fox play Limbo at the Voodoo Rooms.

I had to add this later, because I am a total idiot and forgot it the first time.  God knows why because this looks like pretty much the highlight of my week as far as music is concerned.

Friday 3rd June 2011: The Dead Man’s Waltz, The Stormy Seas & James Metcalfe at Henry’s Cellar Bar.

This should be a rattling good night.  I don’t know anything about the Dead Man’s Waltz, but a quick listen to their stuff sounds very promising – all jaunty banjo and acoustic, foot-tapping Americana.  James Metcalfe from the Pineapple Chunks will be playing solo as well.

The Dead Man’s Waltz – Cry On Me

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Saturday 4th June 2011: Avital Raz & Alex Cornish Song, by Toad House Gig.

Alex let me know last week that he is bringing a string bloody quartet to this gig, which makes it just about the coolest thing we’ve done in the house for a long time. Tickets are available here, and I would be nice if you could buy them in advance

Saturday 4th June 2011: Detour present FOUND at the Electric Circus.

Detour’s Wee Jaunt stumbles about Edinburgh all day, finishing up at the Electric Circus where FOUND will be closing the night with their usual exuberance.  I assume one of the tracks played will be new single Anti-climb Paint, the subject of an absolutely ludicrously brilliant-sounding edible, playable chocolate 7″ single.  Video below.

Sunday 5th June 2011: Julian Lynch, Ducktails & Big Troubles at Sneaky Pete’s.

This gig is being put on by the reprobates behind Gerry Loves Records, and that is good enough for me. It’s less electronic than a couple of their recent releases, nudging more into Kurt Vile territory, but this is fine territory to be in if you ask me.

Julian Lynch – Stomper

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*2005?  2006?  Something like that.

Mrs. Toad's Lettuce

The above picture shows how our veggie patch is doing, for those of you who give a flying fuck, which admittedly might not be many of you.  Sunday was spent lying about in the garden reading books, which was nice and relaxing after getting pished late into the night with Monster Island, These Single Spies and Kid Canaveral after the Henry’s gig on Saturday night.

This Saturday we will be collecting for the RNLI in Stockbridge, so if you want to help out please do get in touch as we will need all the people we can get our hands on.  We promise to feed you and ply you with booze, and it’s generally a really enjoyable day.

Tuesday 26th April 2011: Golden Grrrls, The Oates Field & Fuzzy Star at the Wee Red Bar.

Fuzzy pop reigns this week at The Gentle Invasion’s latest gig, with The Oates Field performing alongside two relatively longstanding Scottish bands I have to confess, rather shame-facedly, to never having heard of.  A bit of an internet poke-around later and it sounds like the whole lineup should be right up my street.  And, hopefully, yours.
WrldPeace by Golden Grrrls

Wednesday 27th April 2011: Pensioner, PAWS & Pinky Suavo at Sneaky Pete’s.

This is likely to be quite similar, in a sense, to the Gentle Invasion gig the night before, with the emphasis on rock rather than pop, but nevertheless blanketed in a haze of guitars.  It is also the Pensioner album launch – they have a new album out on Olive Grove Records.

PAWS – Miss American Bookworm

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Thursday 28th April 2011: Nan Turner & Enfant Bastard at the Collective Gallery.

WH666 presents another rather interesting lineup.  Nan Turner sings and plays drums in New York anti-folkers Schwervon, but listening to her MySpace page that doesn’t give you much idea what to expect from her music.  Also, Enfant Bastard has started adding more to his chiptune stuff which, if I am being honest, pushes it back much closer to the kind of thing I personally am into.  Come along, it’ll be a good ‘un, this.

Friday 29th April – Sunday 1st May 2011: The Grassmarket Festival (Facebook event).

The Grassmarket Festival is a street festival involving all the traders with shops on and around the Grassmarket, and will involved vintage clothing, tat stalls, book and records as well as lots of live music.
The lineup looks roughly like this:
Friday 29th: 6pm, The Last Battle; 7pm, Ballboy.
Saturday 30th: 5pm, Star Wheel Press; 6pm, The Gillyflowers; 7pm, Burnt Island.
Sunday 1st: 3pm, A Right Royal Open Couch Session (in Red Dog Music); 5pm, Edinburgh School for the Deaf; 6pm, Second Hand Marching Band; 7pm, TV21.

Burnt Island – A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again

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Edinburgh School for the Deaf – 11 Kinds of Loneliness

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The Second Hand Marching Band – Don’t!

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The thing I hate the most about Satnavs is that although they do find wherever it is you’re going, but you tend to have absolutely no idea how you got there.  So you are no less lost, in a sense, you just happen to be in the right place.

Well, I am getting a bit like that with my calendar.  I write so much in my calendar that I tend to assume I put everything in it, which I don’t.  The only problem with this is that I make no effort to memorise appointments or events anymore, assuming them to be in my calendar.

Previously, I used to just remember stuff.  That wasn’t entirely failsafe, but I was generally pretty good at keeping things in my head.  Now, once I write things down (or even when I don’t, but assume I have) they just vanish from my head altogether, leaving me entirely at the mercy of the computer.

And frankly, it’s unsettling.  When I do forget something now I feel a bit like you do in those dreams where you’re entirely naked in a public place, or when you’re suddenly on stage, expected to give a grand performance on a musical instrument you never learned to play.  Other people get those dreams, right?  It’s not just me.

Umm, so it’s time for our traditional Friday de-lurking amnesty, time for you shirkers to step out of the shadows, and talk utter pish on the internet.  Friday, after all, is not really for doing work, is it.

1. Are you early, late or completely punctual for appointments?
2. What is your most embarrassing memory failure?
3. What piece of technology would be like a helpless child without (‘your phone’ will be accepted, but please bear in mind it’s a pretty poor answer – not that this is supposed to be all that challenging of course, but a better answer will win you so much more respect, and let’s face it, that’s what it’s all about, eh)?
4. Which dream is the most disconcerting – the falling one, the public nudity one, the crumbling teeth one, or the on stage with no idea what to do one?  Or even a different one, if you like.
5. What was the last question again?

The Mountain Goats – You, or Your Memory

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Bob Dylan – I Forgot More Than You Will Ever Know

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The Last Battle – Photographic Memory

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Micah P. Hinson – I Still Remember

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The Men They Couldn’t Hang – A Night to Remember

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Oh my aching face. This week there will be a total embargo on Fun of any sort, I think, to make up for the last seven days of fairly epic drinking.  Fortunately, it isn’t an overwhelmingly busy week, so I think I should be able to spend most of it at home with a cup of tea, nursing my whimpering liver.

The Ides of Toad night was absolutely amazing on Saturday.  Even with Loch Lomond sneakily squeezed onto the bill, we managed to get all four bands on and off the stage to play roughly half hour sets and finished with about seventy seconds to go – so I owe Alex Fenton and everyone who played a huge thank you for their excellence.

The details of Ides of Toadses still to come are above – with next Friday at Henry’s being the soonest.  We have The Leg, Louis Barabbas and the Bedlam Six and Zed Penguin, tickets can be bought here or at Avalanche in the Grassmarket, and once again we will have to be off the stage by about half ten, so the bands will start pretty punctually and you would be advised to turn up early if you can.

So, do you feel a little bit dirty after all that self-promotion?  Yes, me too, so sorry about that but these things have to be done.  Anyhow, two things which might stand in the way of my anti-fun policy this week are as follows:

Tuesday 22nd February 2011: Yuck, Paws & Young Spooks at Sneaky Pete’s.

People are starting to roll their eyes quite considerably at the term lo-fi, which in some senses I can kind of understand, but I like my loud music to have growl and grumble, not just lots of guitar-bashing and shouting.  This looks like a really good chance to get your your ears cleaned out – all three bands are capable of making a fine old racket.
Rubber by Yuck

Saturday 26th February 2011: Kid Canaveral‘s SXSW Fundraiser, with The Last Battle & Blue Sky Archives at the Wee Red Bar.

Kid Canaveral are Scotland’s premier indie-pop band, and if you fail to have fun at one of their gigs it is probably because you are clinically incapable of having fun.  Getting to Austin for SXSW is an expensive business though, so please come along and support them.

Kid Canaveral – So Close to Beautiful

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I had an awesome week of live music last week, from the Dylan Uncovered on Thursday (from which there is some recorded audio of Esperi and Yusuf Azak’s sets here), to Ringo Deathstarr on Friday and finally Conquering Animal Sound on Saturday.

This week promises to be a little more spread out, but nevertheless just as good.  As well as the return of the Ides of Toad gigs on Saturday (with an ear-carressingly excellent lineup, I might add) we will be recording a Toad Session with Armellodie Records‘ Thirty Pounds of Bone.  The Rob St. John one will be published this Saturday as well, and Rob himself will be here all week recording his debut album, so I am going to be like a giddy little puppy until the inevitable crash on Sunday, I would imagine.

In other news, I assume you’ve heard about Radiohead’s new album?  Presumably inspired by Edinburgh’s Gerry Loves Records, they are releasing the world’s second ever record packaged in newsprint.  Ah well, we all need to draw inspiration from somewhere, and apparently the Hollies don’t have any more good songs to rip off*.

I have to confess that I don’t think Radiohead have released anything which has been much cop since Amnesiac, but I really do salute their excellent adjustment to selling music in the Twenty-First Century.  I know this is all much easier when you are already as famous as they are, but absolutely no-one has adjusted as well, as quickly or as consistently innovatively as they have.  The special edition isn’t even all that pricey – just thirty quid – and I bet it’s fucking gorgeous.

Anyhow, where were we?  Oh yes, gigs:

Tuesday 15th February 2011: Ryan Francesconi, Rob St.John & The Wee Rogue at Old St. Paul’s Church on Jeffrey Street.

Ryan Francesconi is a composer who does a lot of arranging for Joanna Newsom (who has described him as a genius on more than one occasion).  He has recorded several albums of his own, including some amazing solo guitar stuff, which he will be performing on Tuesday, along with some of his Balkan stuff.  Support will come from the excellent Wee Rogue and from Rob St. John – and for those who worry about duplicating their entertainment, Rob will be playing a totally different set to Saturday’s Ides of Toad gig, so I strongly recommend going to both.

Wednesday 16th February 2011: The Last Battle, Letters & Oso Street Outreach at Henry’s Cellar Bar.

This is an interesting one.  I was contacted by Letters’ US PR guys before the band had ever played in Edinburgh, which is actually their hometown.  They were described recently by The Pop Cop as ‘Scotland’s hottest new band’, which seems a little odd for a band who has never played a gig yet, and you can preview a couple of their songs here if you like, and read their interview with Kowalskiy here.

Thursday 17th February 2011: Kill it Kid & Scoundrels at the Electric Circus.

I wasn’t as smitten with the Kill it Kid album as I had expected to be, but by all accounts they are a irresistible force live, and I reckon this could well be worth a punt.  The vocals alone are powerful as hell, and when their bluesy rock ‘n’ roll really gets going I reckon it could be pretty bloody impressive.

Kill it Kid – Send Me and Angel Down

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Saturday 19th February 2011: Rob St.John, Ziggy Campbell & Thirty Pounds of Bone at the Wee Red Bar.

This is going to be a bonanza of goodness.  As well as the awesomeness promised in the official lineup, we also have a special guest added to the bill who we are, for carbonated beverage-related reasons, having to pretend is a secret (the only American band on the label, named after a certain Scottish lake, you get the picture).  Also, Thirty Pounds of Bone will be travelling up from the very bottom left hand corner of the island to play a rare gig up here, and people have told me that the last time they saw him, he was so good that they travelled halfway across Scotland to seem him play the next day again.  Oh, and Rob has promised to play Fucking Loud, by all accounts, so I am expecting heckles of ‘Judas!’ from you.  And if your musical knickers weren’t damp enough already, we also have that Ziggy fella from FOUND, whose own album is released in a few weeks too.  100% pure unadulterated lineup gold!

Loch Lomond – Elephants & Little Girls (Toad Session)

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Saturday 19th February 2011: French Wives EP Launch at Sneaky Pete’s.

Sneaky’s have some really good stuff programmed in for the next month or two, so it’s worth just generally checking out their listings, but this is the one which stood out for me this week.

French Wives – Me vs. Me

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*Dear Radiohead fanatics, that was a joke.  Please do not form an angry mob and try and burn the house down because you hate me for poking gentle fun at your favourite band.

Here we are once more, another week closer to the darkest day of the year, which will be upon us scarily soon. Actually, it’s not the darkest day at all, is it, just the shortest one.  But I think you’ll agree that darkest sounds better.

The week just gone has seen the collapse of the Edinburgh Settlement, a charity which had existed for over a hundred years.  They seemed to hold a rather irresponsibly large number of expensive mortgages, which I can only guess played a significant role in their collapse, and indeed The Forest Cafe, Bristo Hall, The GRV and The Roxy Art House had been on the market for quite a while before the charity finally felt the chop late last week.

That’s all just me speculating of course, so don’t take it too seriously, but at the very least, carrying a lot of debt would not have helped at all as things became progressively tighter towards the end.

More to the point, Edinburgh is now down three venues, and we didn’t really have enough to begin with.  One very important point made in Drowned in Sound’s recent Glasgow love-a-thon was that we suffer very much for a lack of good venues over on this side of the M8.  We’re also pretty bloody short of active promoters at the moment, and this is just going to make it worse, leaving just one or two people to be responsible for the entire musical life of the city, which is really no good at all.

So good luck to all the now unemployed staff, and as for the rest of us (myself included): time to get things happening again please, because otherwise we’re going to end up with no bands at all putting Edinburgh on their tour itinerary.

Tuesday 2nd November 2010: Happy Birthday, Mitchell Museum & Morris Major at Sneaky Pete’s.

This will be straightforward, boisterous, bouncy indie pop from start to finish.  If you can’t have fun at this gig, I am tempted to suggest that you can’t have fun at all.

Mitchell Museum – Take the Tongue Out

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Tuesday 2nd November 2010: Michelle Shocked at the Queen’s Hall.

Michelle Shocked? I hear you ask.  Yes, Michelle Shocked.  She’s possibly gone a bit gospelly, rocky, souly recently – just look at the rather worrying blurb on the QH page – but in her early, acoustic days she wrote some truly wonderful songs.  So approach this with a little caution, but it could be really good.

Michelle Shocked – The L&N Don’t Stop Here Anymore

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Thursday 4th November 2010: Born to Be Wide: Playing Away at the Electric Circus.

The B2BW team bring us more practical tips and advice from the experts in the field.  After briefly shoehorning my way into the back of their A&R one last month, before remembering that I am not in a band and hence have no interest in getting signed and promptly fucking off to the pub instead, I am thinking that this one will be a little quieter and, from my perspective at least, a lot more directly relevant.  It’s about booking tours and getting gigs in faraway places.  Skills it would greatly improve our label to have at our disposal.

Thursday 4th November 2010: The Last Battle, The Scottish Enlightenment & Very Well at the Wee Red Bar.

Two bands you already know fine well I like, with the Scottish Enlightenment mere weeks away from their debut album launch.  A debut album which is, in case you were wondering, very very good indeed.  Very Well, though.  Anyone know anything about them?

The Scottish Enlightenment – The First Will Be Last

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From about 9pm or so UK time we will have the live stream of the Savings and Loan house gig in the player on this post. I’ve put it below the jump because the player has a habit of slowing the whole page down, so click here to view. And if those fuckers try and advertise Maroon fucking 5 to you then I promise it is NOT my fault – it just comes with the basic UStream service and there’s fuck all I can do about it. Read the rest of this entry »